Unlight

Member since June 7, 2008

Member for 17 years, 11 months

member

52 Poems

112 Comments

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Contort the Past

Posted Mar 26, 2020 · 25 lines

Show them how to face their life in this misery.
Teach them flesh and bones:
The dreams of the deceased.

Bleed inside with thoughts of future ecstasy.
Bleed inside with thoughts of future harmony.

Carve your names in stone and pass away.
Butterflies, moths and skeletons - all these clichés...

Bleed inside with thoughts of future ecstasy.
Bleed inside with thoughts of future harmony.

The soul is the answer to all your death’s questions.
Your soul, eaten by the worms of doubt,
your mind is trapped forever in a future past.
The deceased are the ones who always last.

Stay awake; the past is where all your dreams shatter!

Read the rest of the poem Show less

Stay awake; make it last till the beginning of the end!

Bleed inside with thoughts of future ecstasy.
Bleed inside with thoughts of future harmony.

The mind is the only reality of the mind:
A fleshless cage with bars of blood
to harbour your dreams of yesterday.
Contort the past and you will see the way!
Contort the past and you’ll be led astray!

Contort the past and you’ll forever stay
inside your mind with pictures of dismay!

08/11/2019

Unlight’s timeline

June 2023
06 Tue

Anniversary
15 years of membership
March 2020
26 Thu

Posted a poem
Contort the Past
"Show them how to face their life in this misery."
Open thread 25 lines
23 Mon

Posted a poem
Sonnet 8
"I barely hear those noises from behind,"
Open thread 15 lines
23 Mon

Received a critique
on The longing for my beauty...* from @cathy mccormick
"i love this sonnett. regarding a comment about sonnets being romantic, many of the romantic poets, as they are called, wrote sonnetts. and in my opinion a sonnett can certainly be romantic. i do not see iambic pentamete…"
22 Sun

Received a critique
on The longing for my beauty...* from @Geezer
"that many poets find that English is a very hard language to [dare I make up a word here?] poetisize. LoL. But it is true that our language is very hard for some to learn. If you continue to write poetry in English, I w…"
21 Sat

Received a critique
on The longing for my beauty...* from @Gracy
"I agree with the previous commentators. The sonnet is good, but more like one written by a student. There are quite a few clichès, such as in the strophe pasted below: brightness of your eyes>>>>>used a lot. and I shall…"
21 Sat

Received a critique
on The longing for my beauty...* from @Eumolpus
"Hi. Interesting work. I don't understand the above comment. a sonnet has 14 lines, ends in a couplet. some use stanza breaks, others, like Shakespeare, do not. Like a "Sonata" form in music, a three movement work of com…"
21 Sat

Received a critique
on The longing for my beauty...* from @Geezer
"what kind of sonnet this might be. Certainly not romantic? Not with breath that flames! I also don't associate [deepness] with light. More like the mole. ~ Geezer. ."
21 Sat

Posted a poem
The longing for my beauty...*
"The longing for my beauty bends a lot"
Open thread 15 lines
06 Fri

Received a critique
on Awareness from @Gracy
"Knowing that this will be a song, I understand the repetitions. Maybe a bit overloaded with images, but I'll have to return to comment more. Enjoyed."
February 2020
28 Fri

Received a critique
on Awareness from @Eumolpus
"Metaphysics in inevitably linked to logic, and poetry inevitably linked to emotion. Where they meet is a slippery slope. As so so many poets, I also play with these unlikely partners of dance, and so get the intent. I f…"
28 Fri

Posted a poem
Awareness
"Time stands still."
Open thread 19 lines
26 Wed

Received a critique
on Entropic Hate from @Sparrow 42
"Not sure if you wanted to rhyme all the way through, The piece was intense and had much meaning. A balance of rhyme would have been the difference here , Yours Ian T"
25 Tue

Posted a poem
Entropic Hate
"All is done because every day"
Open thread 22 lines
25 Tue

Critiqued
"Life is What You do While You’re Waiting to Die*" by @Eumolpus
"This is some powerful stuff that I've just read. The beginning of the poem is especially powerful and inspired: "All your life you hear the lure of the healers Who tell you to awake from the dimension of self, Tear away…"
21 Fri

Posted a poem
Lonely Speck
"Feel the distance inside"
Open thread 31 lines
19 Wed

Posted a poem
Ego Depletion
"There’s no need for another revolution"
Open thread 29 lines
15 Sat

Posted a poem
Corrupted Hopes
"Just let us paint the shadows"
Open thread 46 lines
08 Sat

Posted a poem
Metaphysical guilt
"Confined in your mind,"
Open thread 21 lines
05 Wed

Posted a poem
Different worlds
"So much is written, carved or etched in stone,"
Open thread 32 lines
04 Tue

Posted a poem
Salvage the Mind
"The light within me"
Open thread 34 lines
January 2020
27 Mon

Posted a poem
Staring into empty space, staring above
"They say we all breathe deeply the same air."
Open thread 20 lines
June 2018
06 Wed

Anniversary
10 years of membership
June 2013
06 Thu

Anniversary
5 years of membership
June 2009
06 Sat

Anniversary
One year of membership
January 2009
10 Sat

Critiqued
"INDIGO ANGEL" by @W.C.Wampler
"This is a really nice poem. I liked it. Sincerely, Ionut"
08 Thu

Critiqued
"Emotion Stagnated" by @Proprietress of Crimson Hearts
"I was thinking more about "only to observe/ that you don't want to see" - “only to observe/ that you don’t want to observe” sounds bad. Well... if you need a repetition... I do not know. I shall think about it. Cheers!"
08 Thu

Critiqued
"Emotion Stagnated" by @Proprietress of Crimson Hearts
"This is a very nice poem, sincerely I tell you. Don't you think is better to change that "see" from the eleventh line with "observe"? Friendly, Ionut"
December 2008
10 Wed

Critiqued
"Dying love (part 2 in a series of 4 poems)" by @Ink Dragon
"Very well written, ID! The idea of the first line is particulary strong."
03 Wed

Critiqued
"Shipwrecks" by @Dolor
""Are there no more places inhabited by essence? Are we cultivating our minds or are we destroying the self? Can we be ourselves throughout the others? And if we can, are we happy for this? Each man should discover his o…"
June 2008
25 Wed

Critiqued
"Epigram 3 - of a couple" by @Marius Surleac
"This is a good epigram, Marius! Hilarious! There's nothing to change here. Greetings!"
22 Sun

Most-discussed work
Sonnet 13

19 critiques to date.
16 Mon

Critiqued
"Sonnet 1" by @Barbara Writes
""I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back" ok :) I don't want to be mean, but this is not a sonnet. Be more careful at prosody! This would be a nice writing if you would copy it into a freeform. Try to cha…"
16 Mon

First critique offered
on "Sonnet To The Birth Of Ideas" by @Jacob
15 Sun

Highest posting month
June 2008 — 18 poems
07 Sat

First publication
Sonnet 1
06 Fri

Joined Neopoet
Membership begins

First poem published 1 days later.

15 years of membership

on The longing for my beauty...* from @cathy mccormick

on The longing for my beauty...* from @Geezer

on The longing for my beauty...* from @Gracy

on The longing for my beauty...* from @Eumolpus

on The longing for my beauty...* from @Geezer

on Awareness from @Gracy

on Awareness from @Eumolpus

on Entropic Hate from @Sparrow 42

"Life is What You do While You’re Waiting to Die*" by @Eumolpus

10 years of membership

5 years of membership

One year of membership

"INDIGO ANGEL" by @W.C.Wampler

"Emotion Stagnated" by @Proprietress of Crimson Hearts

"Emotion Stagnated" by @Proprietress of Crimson Hearts

"Dying love (part 2 in a series of 4 poems)" by @Ink Dragon

"Shipwrecks" by @Dolor

"Epigram 3 - of a couple" by @Marius Surleac

"Sonnet 1" by @Barbara Writes

on "Sonnet To The Birth Of Ideas" by @Jacob

June 2008 — 18 poems

Membership begins

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