the_fool

Member since February 4, 2010

Member for 16 years, 4 months

advocate member

54 Poems

242 Comments

3 Followers

Most recent

sharpest teeth bite from behind (contest to change perception)

Posted Jan 9, 2019 · 43 lines · 2 critiques

these bees will always scheme
lilting their little lilly lies
labors to favors of the field
A song they still sing

The flowers forever meddling
each and over all together
all reaching over each other
dancing until the next dance

she, a siren blooming, nestled soft
giggles in cherubs chancely glees
mmmm.....
a paradise ripe for picking

we grope grasping at the grains of days
that swish the hourglasses infinite whisper

Read the rest of the poem Show less

shhhhhh...
this now Stays Now
our moment forever defutured
newfound and forming
from fantasys' firmed fancies

hand in hand we hold off
hordes of relentless nexts
with pure pugilistic intention
denying them what we all know

seconds stretched and stalled
snapped
soonly swept away
in shattered sighs

hmmmph...
our paradise plucked

Helios, how his head hung so low
bashfully embarrassed
shuffling back beyond that horizon
casting the day down to rest in peace
with all her forgotten sisters
the infinite never-mores

i forfeited him every last week
and every days' yesters i'd had
i offered my many tomorrows
and begged to keep just this today
shhhh...

he sunk sneaking one last peek
assured the day did sleep
and winked us a tearful goodnight

the_fool’s timeline

February 2025
03 Mon

Anniversary
15 years of membership
February 2020
03 Mon

Anniversary
10 years of membership
January 2019
27 Sun

Received a critique
on sharpest teeth bite from behind (contest to change perception) from @scribbler
"In my old age I can't remember Who this reminds me of but it Does strike a familiar bell. I like the use of bees and flowers . Good luck in contest"
14 Mon

Received a critique
on sharpest teeth bite from behind (contest to change perception) from @weirdelf
"This is remarkable work, especially in terms of the contest, maybe they feed your serious side of spirit? I agree with Mark, it could do with a little edit and tidying up. Do you want specific suggestions?"
11 Fri

Critiqued
"Really" by @weirdelf
"I can't remember ever commenting anything of any substance on ur work beyond the usual "liked it. Made me feel...". This one included. I liked it. Even liked the discussion of dreams it's inspired here. I suggested some…"
11 Fri

Critiqued
"Worn Visage ( plus the psychedelic vid version)" by @weirdelf
"This was a fun read for me. The first of urs I read in a long time & it didn't disappoint. I often laugh & point at child-like stupidity &, more often then I'd admit, they tend to laugh back. Good to see u again, friend"
09 Wed

Posted a poem
sharpest teeth bite from behind (contest to change perception)
"these bees will always scheme"
Open thread 43 lines
09 Wed

Critiqued
"Really" by @weirdelf
"First day back & for the first time ever I found something of yours to criticize! Unless u did this on purpose. If u did just give me at least an hour to feel smart before telling me. "I cannot sleep for dreamin'. I can…"
09 Wed

Critiqued
"Annihilation Point " by @zebra
"Very interesting piece. Made me thankful I don't have any kids of my own. So, it moved me. Stirred. It's a bit choppy as some of the lines stand alone & then others read connected to the next. But maybe it's supposed to…"
09 Wed

Critiqued
"The One Face That Reveals Them All" by @quillsveinback
"Oops. Posted twice"
09 Wed

Critiqued
"The One Face That Reveals Them All" by @quillsveinback
"I stumbled a few times on my first read-thru, started getting the hang of it, then figured out what was throwing me off. So, the second & third time I read thru I was more easily moved. This is a decent piece that could…"
February 2015
03 Tue

Anniversary
5 years of membership
April 2014
25 Fri

Received a critique
on trudging the hours beyond the blue fiasco from @Ian.T
"As you wander in and through these worlds you have portrayed them in a good write, I enjoyed it yet have the fear of sitting alone in a window watching the world go by, there is so much to do each day, Yours Ian.T"
22 Tue

Posted a poem
trudging the hours beyond the blue fiasco
"two men enter"
Open thread 56 lines
August 2013
02 Fri

Received a critique
on lazy bairn are born of the flightless stork from @Ian.T
"Good exercise for you to find out why the "0" Look to the future look to the past His Number is Zero!! Good write though I struggled a little in the flow I will wait for others to read and comment.. Your Title "lazy bai…"
01 Thu

Posted a poem
lazy bairn are born of the flightless stork
"an angry face of four and twenty"
Open thread 30 lines
January 2013
23 Wed

Critiqued
"A final respect in red, as she requested" by @Jenifer James
"i try to avoid one word titles since it suggests 'this is my only poem on this subject', plus there's a good chance it may alrdy be used elsewhere. and don't be afraid of making it long. it has to be as unique as the po…"
22 Tue

Received a critique
on water beds (my first haiku) from @Seren
"I laughed out loud I love this one Bravo Love Jc xxx"
22 Tue

Critiqued
"False" by @sueb
"this seems to have been thrown together in a rush. there's no rhythm for the rhymes. there's no solid subject. it could be about any lie any liar ever lied at any time. it needs a lot of work if it's ever going to be li…"
21 Mon

Received a critique
on water beds (my first haiku) from @Frenchf
"Soo pithily funny!"
21 Mon

Received a critique
on water beds (my first haiku) from @weirdelf
"and steamy. Love it. And reminded of why WC Fields claimed he never drank water "fish fuck in it""
21 Mon

Received a critique
on water beds (my first haiku) from @themoonman
"and here we are thinking water beds are cool great imagery and focus here, title couldn't have been better, a truly unique poem. thanks for posting !!!"
21 Mon

Posted a poem
water beds (my first haiku)
"fish finished fucking,"
Open thread 3 lines
December 2012
24 Mon

Posted a poem
that whimper we keep hearing about
"schools are chained and padlocked"
Open thread 20 lines
October 2012
07 Sun

New follower
@Seren
September 2012
09 Sun

Posted a poem
docents: the unkown global ambition
"another aged vanity"
Open thread 13 lines
05 Wed

Posted a poem
the bit and trod of the savage petunia
"pinch of gloss"
Open thread 22 lines
August 2012
15 Wed

Posted a poem
sympathetic gesture in pennies
"perched upon a pallet"
Open thread 8 lines
April 2012
11 Wed

Posted a poem
flies have no holidays
"part clod hop post paseo down lamar"
Open thread 42 lines
March 2012
18 Sun

Posted a poem
anonymass-hole
"lips too small and thin"
Open thread 23 lines
January 2012
14 Sat

New follower
@scribbler
13 Fri

Posted a poem
limping alone
"wet sniffles thru smudged rose blush"
Open thread 34 lines
11 Wed

Posted a poem
faceless (prose)
"You couldn’t really call him homeless. He always felt comfortable where he was. Always able to sleep well on any given surface.. He never considered something as cliche as ‘the city is my home’. No, he just never really considered having a home. This is how he wanted to live, without any connections or attachments. He didn’t even dream of having anything more. Real dreams. Sleeping dreams. Not aspirations. Hell, he didn’t even want respect. There was no talking to strangers or introductions. He’d gone so long without telling anyone his name that even having one was an alien concept to him. He really was a nobody. Not even a noticeable background extra."
Open thread 9 lines
December 2011
01 Thu

New follower
@weirdelf
February 2011
03 Thu

Anniversary
One year of membership
February 2010
17 Wed

Most-discussed work
amateur, uneducated poet

14 critiques to date.
15 Mon

Highest posting month
February 2010 — 13 poems
07 Sun

First critique offered
on "small price to pay for truth " by @Seren
04 Thu

First publication
the man who writes at night
03 Wed

Joined Neopoet
Membership begins

First poem published 1 days later.

About Me

Location: Austin, TX, USA

Contest Wins

This member has not yet won any contests.

Workshops

		Skill level:
More Meter	(syllabus)	Shark Pool, Plunge Pool	Started 2012-01-11	Concluded

15 years of membership

10 years of membership

on sharpest teeth bite from behind (contest to change perception) from @scribbler

on sharpest teeth bite from behind (contest to change perception) from @weirdelf

"Really" by @weirdelf

"Worn Visage ( plus the psychedelic vid version)" by @weirdelf

"Really" by @weirdelf

"Annihilation Point " by @zebra

"The One Face That Reveals Them All" by @quillsveinback

"The One Face That Reveals Them All" by @quillsveinback

5 years of membership

on trudging the hours beyond the blue fiasco from @Ian.T

on lazy bairn are born of the flightless stork from @Ian.T

"A final respect in red, as she requested" by @Jenifer James

on water beds (my first haiku) from @Seren

"False" by @sueb

on water beds (my first haiku) from @Frenchf

on water beds (my first haiku) from @weirdelf

on water beds (my first haiku) from @themoonman

One year of membership

February 2010 — 13 poems

on "small price to pay for truth " by @Seren

Membership begins

About Me

Recent Work

Contest Wins

Workshops

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