Whiskurz

Member since April 12, 2012

Member for 14 years, 1 month

member

44 Poems

10 Comments

0 Followers

Most recent

Cutting the Cheese

Posted Jul 15, 2010 · 26 lines · 2 critiques

It was time for our annual cookout

That's when my wife asked me please

"If you get the time and you don't mind,

Could I ask you to please cut the cheese?"

I have to admit I was puzzled

I couldn't imagine what she means

So that's when I went to the kitchen

And opened me some beans

By the time I was finished

The people started to amass

My wife said, "It's time to get started,

Read the rest of the poem Show less

Would you please pass the gas?"

So off I went to get some more beans

By now I was getting pretty full

Trying to figure out who would be first

To offer my finger to pull

By the time I got back it had started

But it ended in minutes to my shame

I burned down half of the city

I was standing too close to the flame

Whiskurz’s timeline

April 2022
12 Tue

Anniversary
10 years of membership
April 2017
12 Wed

Anniversary
5 years of membership
April 2013
12 Fri

Anniversary
One year of membership
April 2012
13 Fri

Received a critique
on Glass Wedding from @weirdelf
"but I'm afraid the structure, including forced rhymes and a singsong meter, reduces it to just sentiment. Your use of iambic/anapestic meters with mixed feet could perhaps be more effective regularised to iambic pentame…"
12 Thu

Received a critique
on Tears Are A Language from @Tommi Cordial
"A beautiful write...simply beautiful I'm speechless."
12 Thu

Received a critique
on Tears Are A Language from @raj
"This is a nicely emoted version of the tear drop of deep seated hurt and sadness..good in cadence and rhyme..."
12 Thu

Joined Neopoet
Membership begins

First poem published 1 days later.
July 2010
15 Thu

Posted a poem
Cutting the Cheese
"  "
Open thread 26 lines
14 Wed

Posted a poem
The Artist's Reflection
"  "
Open thread 26 lines
13 Tue

Posted a poem
Where Flowers Grow
"  "
Open thread 25 lines
12 Mon

Most-discussed work
Hope in Hopelessness

12 critiques to date.
June 2010
15 Tue

Highest posting month
June 2010 — 24 poems
May 2010
23 Sun

First publication
Under the Magnolia Tree

Whiskurz

Cutting the Cheese

Whiskurz’s timeline

10 years of membership

5 years of membership

One year of membership

on Glass Wedding from @weirdelf

on Tears Are A Language from @Tommi Cordial

on Tears Are A Language from @raj

Membership begins

Cutting the Cheese

The Artist's Reflection

Where Flowers Grow

Hope in Hopelessness

June 2010 — 24 poems

Under the Magnolia Tree

About Me

Recent Work

Fall's Allegiance

A Love Poem

Pain

Under the Magnolia Tree

Contest Wins

Workshops

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