TIDAL FLAT

suspend my want
this thick edged wind
that brushs my hair
caresses my face

I walk boldly with awkward
gait
you are taking all of me
just to travel

I remember the fine buttons
and walking hands
crafting blueprint love

and the wind scratched
at the window and pushed
the house to complain
creaking like oars
rowing past the moon
that slipped through
cream mountian passes

how I want
the need I never empty

you turn in thoughts
like a barrel
polished and ported
dangerous
and beautiful

you turn and smile

and beyond the night
a star plunges
striking fast
the plate
of precious pretty

— Esker, May 26, 2010

About This Poem

About the Author

Region, Country: north ontario, CAN

Favorite Poets: Klo , .., Ida, .., Rhiannon1010, .., Pleiades, .., Valryianne, .., Ester, .., Stephanie, .., Emina Smajevic, ..., Elefentee, ..., Sommer Lyn, ..., Jasmine, ..., Rula, ...

Critiques

Esker

16 years ago

how we invoke

this is from you

pleiades

16 years ago

“you are taking all of

"you are taking all of me just to travel" "how i want the need i never empty" every time e, EVERY time i read you, there is always something that jumps out at me normally, i read you a number of times to really absorb... to have the words sink in this time, i didn't this time, i'm commenting after just the one read, because for whatever reason, this one made me sit back in my chair, and say 'fuck. this guy can write' i don't want to pull it apart i don't want to peel layers i just want to savour it p

Esker

16 years ago

there is a way to record

the minute collisions on atomic level the spin offs of broken atomic matter on plates I cant go into scientific jargon but the results are beautiful designs Its like photographic plates of photos of all things and that sometimes we get spin offs from others from a look a connection that spins long after the effect such is the affect and for me every little connection with others when Im focused IS precious so when I speak or interchange with others I try to make a beautiful spin off maybe I just need sleep and take my meds..now Im unsure but Im not Uncertian Esker~ (for P )

Janice Pearce

16 years ago

Tidal Flat

Some beautiful words woven here.I have to be honest tho, and say I didn't care for the last line.[This could be me] ___________________________________________________ Income-tax forms should be more realistic by allowing the taxpayer to list "Uncle Sam" as a dependent Anonymous

Breakinglogic

16 years ago

hello esker :)

I agree with both pleiades and janice. You write extremely well. Also, I think the last is off key; Seems to take a different tone than the rest of the write. Excellent write nonetheless. I can't pick out anything in particular I like most, the whole poem was equally elegant. Peace and cheers, logic

raskin

16 years ago

That last part leads me to

That last part leads me to think about the awkwardness of that moment. That klutzy or crap moment I can't believe I did that at that moment. That's how I took it. I like how you put images together. raskin

Grassfield

16 years ago

Don't change a thing.....

the ending is ephemeral...a falling star...a super-nova...the climax...it is...the ending. Damn I'm green with envy! You are very talented. I enjoyed this second poem almost as much as the first...(the first is always the best)...will read more. Thank you for sharing your beauty!

Esker

16 years ago

finding in the common wreckage / treasures

im pleased that there is stumbling at the last line like leaving the bus of emptiness the ghost of those in seats Blue stubs of hours transfer papers discarded journeys face up face down like Tarot secrets the last line is the most poignant one for me like turning over the coin tossed with the warm hand and finding either fate standing in the door of the spinning wheel of the car the moment after the gun crashes and the plate slips when you know its beautiful that its precious and can be gone in a flash like the cracking of the back thats what the last line is its precious its something you never own but treasure like smoke like a look in the mirror and then move on

xena465

16 years ago

I agree with Grassfield

This is a super write Esker. One of your best. I love the imagination and craft of the writing. Just a couple of typos... that {brushs} my hair ………[brushes] cream {mountian} passes ………[mountain] [ai] Rosina xena465