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Breakinglogic
Breakinglogic
Jan 05, 2010 ⭐ View statistics (Premium feature)

take me limited

Do not strain your discernmentTake me face value, skin deepBreak me from your minds internmentPlain eyed look, what's more I'll keep Let me wear my smoke and mirrorsMy illusion is complexThough plenty more here than appearsOnly careful light reflects Take note of me, verbatimMy lines made shy in betweenI will have no ultimatumPretty shells will paint my scene
— Breakinglogic, Jan 05, 2010

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Region, Country: California, USA

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Critiques

DawningDaytripper

DawningDaytripper

16 years 5 months ago

That was a great ryhme and

That was a great ryhme and flow Logic. I liked your lines, Let me wear my smoke and mirrors My illusion is complex Though plenty more here than appears Only careful light reflects Great Stanza. I will be sure to read more. Julie D.D.
B

BrightEyed

16 years 5 months ago

beautiful

i agree with the person above me. that was my favorite part as well. Brilliant
P

poewriter58

16 years 4 months ago

Logic

The only thing , in my opinion see that needs a little work your ending seems weak( your last line) what other than "pretty shells" might you use instead and maintain the force of the rest of the poem Chrys