No taste for surviving

Darling woman, & you can talk! I have just returned from your little set of gems (& I SOOOOO adore bees, I was elated!) & I feel all excited & abuzzz... I have missed you my friend, I must get less busy, I want more Ann of Norway. Thank you lovely one, it seems sad, when I thought I was not, history lingers sometimes doesn't it. It was actually the second part of a write I began after thinking about our Beki faery, but this seemed to want to be outed more urgently so I will post the other later, it is a sad thing too, ah well, life is happy/sad/wondrous/brilliant & many hues between each day! xxx great love to you Anni ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ "...We ask ourselves, who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, and fabulous? Actually, who are you not to be? ... Your playing small doesn't serve the world..."

Mmmm, the freedom of the sky, it is my daily healing, pleasure & joy. Ah my shining wonderful friend, how I love your words. You know, it did feel like "a poet stretching"... you always know Steven, you know these things so simply yet deeper than most anyone sees with normal eyes... but your's could never be merely normal could they?! They have seen & known maybe too much sadness in your own time, it digs a deeper hollow in us as writers doesn't it. A blessing & a curse, sometimes it is harder to fill, & sometimes it overflows with more joy & love than one might think possible. Sorry to set your day with such sad sentiment, this write emptied me, the second part of a sad reflection on bad choices I suppose... & then I read Ann lovely whimsicle write of the morning... & was revived! & now this lovely comment from you, I feel sated now & can sleep with sweeter dreams for an hour or so (I hope). Thank you. I love your new pic by the way, makes you look gorgeously Indian (did you say you had some herritage?) (Don't worry I am just acknowledging, not flirting!). Ahh the magpies have begun their supurb song at my window... I must try to catch some sleep! All good things O' xx Anni ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ "...We ask ourselves, who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, and fabulous? Actually, who are you not to be? ... Your playing small doesn't serve the world..."

Hi Gee, Thanks dear one. I am thriving in many ways, always have on some levels I guess, I learned how to do that, horrified at the thought of being a victim, but sometimes it seems the ghosts just tug & tug at you. As I said above, I began a piece inspired by thinking of our lovely Beki & this was a kind of digression on that one, it left me feeling so hopeless though, I hope (heh irony) it doesn't do that to others. Sometimes I know it helps to see someone else coping with loss though, I think it did me for a time recently. Either way, yes I am flying, but I think I fly & glide just like all of us, there is no comparison, we all have strengths & weaknesses, the rest is just taste... (heh, the taste for surviving?... not my preference, I wish not to go back to that place ever again)... & you, my friend, know well how to fly. Take care. Anni xx Anni ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ "...We ask ourselves, who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, and fabulous? Actually, who are you not to be? ... Your playing small doesn't serve the world..."

Thanks Katie, just a reflection on my past really nothing awful happening just now except too many reminders of a crushed possibility I suppose. Glad you liked it, I must go see if you have any I have missed, will do so after work tonight if I run out of time now. Hope all is well in your world. Cheers Anni ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ "...We ask ourselves, who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, and fabulous? Actually, who are you not to be? ... Your playing small doesn't serve the world..."

Oh Anna, I'm sad that you do, it's not a nice place to be really, still as with most things there is always such duality, I know you also refuse to be victim, I feel it in you & thus you paint your world far more beautiful (& we all benefit)... These butterfly wings you show today are an example, addressing the sense of helplessness in the face of what fate has dealt. Dearest Anna, put those little babies on & take off, away from that bitter taste, I know I don't need to tell you that, & on reflection, I don't even know if your comment means you are experiencing that sense now... I guess I wish we could all rise butterfly gentle above these wounds of our hearts, & I know eventually we do, however we do it, often through writing I know this also. Anni ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ "...We ask ourselves, who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, and fabulous? Actually, who are you not to be? ... Your playing small doesn't serve the world..."