Hurt (part 1 in a series of 4 poems)

"Time changed its mind, it will not heal."
(Proprietress of Crimson Hearts)

Not only her body was being hurt
her soul was in even worse pain
With every blow of his hand against her skin
he was destroying something deep inside

Someone was screaming
she could not discern significant words
the ringing in her ears was much too loud
now, she had no patience for verbosity

all she did have was wordless
nameless grief devouring her innards
until her very self would dissolve
into an unrecognizable lump

Where had safety and comfort gone?
She was unable to find them
Where had her self-respect gone?
She was unable to find herself

She was groping through the darkness inside her
looking for light and warmth
knowing all the time that there was nothing left
apart from a pitch black, abruptly gaping abyss

She had always been afraid of that abyss
feared falling into it
since she knew exactly
what was lying in wait for her on its ground

Rage, the voracious predator
she had once cast into it herself
and Hate, the repulsive monster
that had always been dwelling down there

The light had been what had transfixed them
restricted them, kept them at bay
but now the light had been extinguished
there was nothing but gloom

She knew that Rage and Hate fed on that gloom
that they would grow and strengthen
until her soul would be on fire
and she would burn like a torch, a beacon, a pyre