That's all I ask for

THAT’S ALL I ASK FOR A warm touch A tender smile Once in a while That’s all I ask for My love A knowing glance Across the room That’s all I ask From you My love No dreams No illusions Are mine My love No expectations

of

Future days My love Only one look To show You know Who I amAnd what it took To walk away My love

— Geremia, Nov 07, 2008

About This Poem

About the Author

Country/Region: USA

Critiques

Jasmine

17 years 7 months ago

Absolutely beautiful!!!!!

Joe, This is all we ask for .... your words jump in the heart!!!!! Love it!!!! Jaz

themoonman

17 years 7 months ago

Longo...

I don't think I've commented on anything of yours as of yet... let me offer a late Welcome to Neopoet... I hope you find it as fulfilling as most others do... Your poem... in my humble opinion the repetition of "My Love" and the spacing detracted from the read... what is the spacing for? I liked the write but felt it could have been much stronger... I do hope this review of mine does not offend you in any way... it is just the opinion of one... and you are the author... Richard

Geremia

17 years 7 months ago

That;s all ask for

J.B. Longo-Geremia Thanks, Richard, I do appreciate your comments and am pleased you read my poem. I use a great deal of enjambement to either emphsaize the rhyme and also to focus on certan words that generally get lostin a regular syntax, The repetition of MY LOVE is also a dramatic device, I kind of was influenced by it's yu in one of Vergil's pooem ORPHEUS. Produces a subtle strengh that manifests emotonal self control yet pain at the same t ime, Anyway...:) Thanks again for your comments

themoonman

17 years 7 months ago

Longo...

thank you for responding so intelligently... it is appreciated... my point about the spacing... it is meant to pause the readers flow... I would be willing to bet that when you read this poem out loud, you are not pausing between each line... of course.. I could be wrong... Repetition doesn't always work to add drama or flavor to a poem, sometimes it detracts from the write... Your point about certain words getting lost in the syntax.. maybe, but not by most of the people here... Richard

Nordic cloud

17 years 2 months ago

You magician Joe

Wonderfully controlled flight of words down the page and into our hearts. Anna dalla Norvegia.