Why Don’t You Come to Visit Me?

Why Don’t You Come to Visit Me? Why don’t you come to visit me?Why aren’t you starring in my dreams?You’ve stopped by to comfort everyoneExcept me, or so it seems Did you know I finally quit the smokes?Those Camels almost broke my backI’m not sure where I found the willBut I never took another drag How ‘bout my blowout in the passing lane?I seem to have the worst of luckBut I’m fortunate I didn’t rolloverSaid the man in the tow truck Have you heard that Mom is healthy?All of our prayers were answeredHer last visit to the doctors showedagain, no signs of cancer You know a seagull shit on Ronnie’s head?One shit on Robert in Florida, tooI only wish that you were with usSo I could laugh at them, with you Have you read anything I wrote for you?A sudden gift to write in rhymeI wonder where I find these words?They just come to me all the time So, why don’t you come visit me?Why aren’t you starring in my dreams?You’ve stopped by to comfort everyoneEspecially me, so now it seems

— tbeaudet, Sep 08, 2008

About This Poem

About the Author

Region, Country: Boston, USA

Favorite Poets: Patti Smith, Lucinda Williams, John Prine, Bruce Springsteen, Jim Carroll, Bob Dylan, Tom Waites

Critiques

panaella

17 years 9 months ago

domesticity...

Hello, I enjoyed being taken through this domestic scene in your write. Your opening & closing stanzas were neatly linked and the crafting of 'especially' on the final line had impact, I thought. I like your style...reminds me of mine! Regards, Ellie.

panaella

17 years 9 months ago

PS...

Hello, Are you writing to your son?or a missing family memeber?....(if that is too personal , I apologise) Ellie.

tbeaudet

17 years 9 months ago

Thanks Ellie

This is written to my 22 yr. old son Ryan, who was killed in a motorcycle accident in August of 2004. I began writing after this tragedy, and it's been great therapy for me and my family. You'll see most of my work has been inspired by Ryan. Thanks for your kind words and comments. Tom

infinite_dwarf

17 years 8 months ago

Tom

What an awesome work. So sad, yet it's like you took life, cut it open for us, and let us peek inside. Nice job. ~Jess ---------------------------------------------------- "Live every day as if it were your last; one day you'll be right...."

tbeaudet

17 years 8 months ago

Thanks Jess

I really do appreciate your kind words and comments. Tom

Rett

17 years 8 months ago

Ah my friend

Still so sad, yet there is a ray of sunlight there also. I have not lost a son or daughter and God knows I never want to feel that pain. Once again you have taken your soul, opened the doors and let us see the yearning for one lost in this physical world, yet still there withing a heart filled with love. I am so sorry I have been so long getting to this. Life has it's way of slapping us upside the head. I am back on a somewhat even keel although the seas are still rather choppy. I truly loved this write , which, as usual, is of impeccable standards. Well done my friend. I hope you and the family is well. Thank you for sharing. Respectfully, Rett: "We can all be thankful that Picasso wasn't a plastic surgeon." Rett

tbeaudet

17 years 7 months ago

Thanks again, Rett

I've been away for awhile now..... Very busy with work, my personal laptop crashed, out for service for a few weeks, and ruptured disks making it impossible to get comfortable. That saga will continue for a few more weeks to come, but I have my laptop back. As always, thank you for reading and commenting on my work. Your critiques are the one's that matter most to me. Hope all is well... Tom

Nordic cloud

16 years 3 months ago

Ann of NorwayThis verse is a

Ann of Norway This verse is a little unhappy in its rhythm:- How ‘bout my b... again, no signs of cancer" .......a word more for the rhythm - occcured? Otherwise it was well structured and good, a sad sounding theme, you give us the feeling of the pain of no communictaion with someone you love. Love Ann.

tbeaudet

16 years 3 months ago

This one does stumble a bit

I didn't spend a lot of time on this one Ann, and I agree it needs some attention. I will attempt to smooth this one out, and I hope you're the first to read the revision. Thanks for commenting... I had forgotten about this one that I had meant to get back to.