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Jun 18, 2026
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Safe passage ?
Not long ago
I came to a conclusion
Well, more of a crossroads
Not the kind where you sell your soul
To the devil at midnight
But the
Existential
Elemental
Transcendental kind
That keeps you awake nights
The kind that makes you doubt
All you thought you were about
And to stretch the metaphor
I had three choices
Assuming that going back
Was not an option
Having learned from youth
To follow a path
By habitude
As Is the way of most
And I'm no exception
The straight and level path ahead
Seemed to me
On balance to be
The easiest
The safest
Most logical
The roads right and left
Were dusty, rutted
Strewn with rocks
Obscure and insecure
But living only once
I can surely say
That one of these
Will be my way
— tim spencer-smith, Jun 18, 2026
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About This Poem
Style/Type: Free verse
Review Request Direction:
What did you think of my title?
How was my language use?
What did you think of the rhythm or pattern or pacing?
How does this theme appeal to you?
How was the beginning/ending of the poem?
Is the internal logic consistent?
Review Request Intensity: I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back
Editing Stage: Polished draft
Critiques
neopoet
1 month ago
Neopoet AI [2026-06]
The below is a computer-generated response from Neo, Neopoet’s AI:
The poem's central metaphor — the crossroads as existential reckoning — is handled with a light, self-aware touch that serves it well. The parenthetical disclaimer about the devil at midnight is genuinely effective; it signals the speaker's awareness of the cliché and pivots cleanly toward something more interior. The stacked adjectives "existential / elemental / transcendental" work as a kind of comic escalation before landing on the quiet, honest admission that follows. The ending also earns something: the turn toward the imperfect roads, chosen precisely because life is singular, lands with quiet conviction.
The middle stanza is where momentum stalls. "Having learned from youth / to follow a path / by habitude / as is the way of most / and I'm no exception" covers ground the reader has already intuited from the crossroads setup, and the phrasing "on balance to be" feels like filler inserted to maintain the line breaks rather than doing real work. Trimming or compressing this passage — perhaps collapsing the observation about habitude into a single sharp line — would let the final stanza arrive with more force. The rhyme of "about / about" in the first stanza is also a small stumble worth smoothing out; pairing "about" with itself flattens a moment that otherwise has real energy.
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Geezer
1 month ago
Damn...
I was building to the big ending,
and right in the last stanza... Here it comes...
What?
But only living once, I can surely say
that one of these will be my way?
How about something like:
The roads, both right and left
Strewn with rocks are insecure
But as I will live just once,
I'll take the most twisted one for sure
Sorry, I just couldn't help rhyming this one, but you did it first.
~ Geezer
Lavender
1 month ago
Safe Passage?
Hello, Tim,
Although I understand the irony and light humor in the ending, I'll agree with Geezer - I'd love to live vicariously through the poem and choose the path most twisted!
I look forward to reading more of your work.
Welcome to Neopoet!
Lavender
BlueSkies
1 month ago
Tim,
I very much enjoyed this poem! (the ending too!) I may have to disagree with Geezer and Lavender. I think subtle endings have their own unique flavor... Sometimes, a gentle step in the right direction is more rewarding than going out with a bang.
Well done! I look forward to reading more!
And also, welcome to Neopoet!
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