The Ones Who Howl

The below is a computer-generated response from Neo, Neopoet’s AI:

This poem explores themes of displacement, survival, and empathy through the metaphor of hyenas encroaching on a village. The narrative voice effectively bridges the gap between human and animal experience, inviting readers to reconsider the labels and judgments often placed on those struggling to survive.

The progression from external observation ("The hyenas are getting closer") to internal reflection ("I wanted to tell him I understand") is well-structured, creating a contemplative mood. The poem’s use of direct address ("But what would you do if it was you") engages the reader and encourages self-examination.

Consider sharpening some of the imagery to deepen emotional impact. For example, the phrase "My heart sang a silent song to his" is evocative but somewhat abstract; grounding this metaphor with more sensory detail could enhance resonance. Additionally, the poem might benefit from varied line lengths or rhythmic shifts to mirror the tension between the encroaching threat and the speaker’s quiet empathy.

The closing lines poignantly capture isolation in tragedy, but the phrase "He always seems to do so / Alone" could be more impactful if given greater emphasis, perhaps through spacing or punctuation, to underline the loneliness.

Overall, the poem thoughtfully challenges perceptions of otherness and survival, and with some refinement in imagery and rhythm, it can achieve a stronger emotional connection with readers.

Please send feedback about Neo (our AI critique system) to neopoet.com/contact

Hello, Trail,

Truly brought tears to my eyes. I have no words, just overflowing feelings.

Thank you so much for sharing your gift.

Lx

 that Hyenas howl, I went to listen to them howling in a video,
and it is just as lonely as anything I have ever heard; rougher than a wolf and not so plaintive, but more of an aggravated complaint, that sounds really pissed off. I understand your empathy for them. They are magnificent creatures that are slowly being driven out of existence due to the constant pressure of land development and the elimination of food sources. I have a slight issue with the last stanza, as the statement of:

"It didn't mean much" as it seems the whole point of the poem is that it does mean something, and you commiserate with them. How about like this?

As I stood on my veranda
My heart sang a silent song to his
When a man goes through tragedy
He always seems to do so alone
Like the last of the hyenas

~ Geez.
.

That's a powerful and evocative poem. It really gets at the heart of what it means to be misunderstood and to suffer alone, whether you're a human or a hyena.

The poem seems to explore a deep empathy for the hyenas, imagining their perspective and what might drive them to come closer to the village. It suggests that their actions aren't born of malice, but of desperation—a response to having their land and food sources taken away. The lines, "what would you do if it was you / Whose lands had been forcibly seized," are particularly striking, as they force the reader to confront the human role in the hyenas' plight.

The poem also draws a parallel between the "lone one" howling and the speaker's own feelings of tragedy and solitude. The speaker's silent song to the hyena's howl creates a moment of connection across species, suggesting a shared experience of loneliness and suffering. But the final lines, "when a man goes through tragedy / He always seems to do so / Alone," bring the poem back to a somber, solitary reality, highlighting the isolation that often accompanies profound sadness.

Thank you for sharing this. It's a beautiful piece of writing.

Mark via Gemini

Enjoyed the read. There are obvious parallels with refugees, I suppose, whether intended or not.