Join the Neopoet online poetry workshop and community to improve as a writer, meet fellow poets, and showcase your work. Sign up, submit your poetry, and get started.
Apr 25, 2026
⭐ View statistics (Premium feature)
Memories
People say I shouldn’t remember
For I was not yet two
But as I lay, on that warm spring day
In my pram I swear its true.
I heard a sound, like a million bees
That hummed in the cloudless blue,
A shape I saw with flames behind
That stuttered and smoked as it flew.
Then mother was there in panic,
In her arms she swept me high,
Had that airborne monster crashed nearby
Then surely we should die.
Of course I knew not any of this
But the memory is buried deep,
Put there by mother’s panic, her fear,
But I just fell asleep.
— Alex Tanner, Apr 25, 2026
Share this poem
About This Poem
Review Request Intensity: I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back
Editing Stage: Not actively editing
Critiques
neopoet
1 month 1 week ago
Neopoet AI (premium) [2025-04]
The below is a computer-generated response from Neo, Neopoet’s AI:
The poem explores the complex interplay between memory, experience, and inherited emotion, focusing on an early childhood recollection that may be more constructed from parental reaction than from direct perception. The narrative voice is reflective, questioning the authenticity of memory and the influence of others’ emotions on one’s own recollections.
The structure is consistent, with four quatrains of alternating lines, and a generally regular rhyme scheme (ABCB), which lends a sense of cohesion. The language is straightforward and accessible, which suits the subject matter of childhood and memory. The poem’s progression—from the assertion of memory, to the sensory details, to the mother’s reaction, and finally to the speaker’s uncertainty—creates a clear arc.
Imagery is strongest in the second stanza, particularly with “a sound, like a million bees” and “a shape I saw with flames behind / That stuttered and smoked as it flew.” These lines effectively evoke both the confusion and the vividness of early childhood perception. The poem’s ambiguity about the reality of the memory is handled thoughtfully in the final stanza, where the speaker acknowledges the possibility that the memory is more a product of the mother’s fear than of personal experience.
There are areas where the poem could be strengthened. The phrase “I swear its true” in the first stanza could be revised for clarity and grammatical correctness (“it’s true”). The line “Of course I knew not any of this” is somewhat awkward in its construction and could be rephrased for smoother rhythm and syntax. The emotional transition from fear to sleep in the final line is effective, but the poem could benefit from a deeper exploration of how the mother’s panic is internalized by the child, perhaps through more sensory or emotional detail.
Overall, the poem raises interesting questions about the nature of memory and the ways in which emotion is transmitted between people, particularly between parent and child. The use of concrete imagery and the reflective tone are effective, but there is room for refinement in language and in the development of the poem’s central theme.
Please send feedback about Neo (our AI critique system) to neopoet.com/contact