Join the Neopoet online poetry workshop and community to improve as a writer, meet fellow poets, and showcase your work. Sign up, submit your poetry, and get started.

Marat

“still bleeding”

They found him hunched in the steaming bath,
ink staining the surface like blood’s rehearsal,
his voice still echoing down stone corridors—
a voice not for song, but flint.
Even his pulse wrote pamphlets.

He died not once, but
in verses draped across salon walls,
in paintings that turned martyr into marble,
into myth—but he lived as a nerve unshut.

And now? We are the heirs of flooded inboxes,
the revolution reduced to a push notification.
But we, too, sit soaking
in the lukewarm waters of exhausted hope,
dreaming of clean slates while the ceiling leaks indignity.

What use is a quill now, Marat?
They click and scroll, skim and forget.
Would you shout into the algorithm?
Would your lists survive the purge?

Yet— still I see you, in subway glares,
in climate petitions signed with trembling thumbs,
in the voice that cracks at town halls and still speaks anyway.

You are not dead.
You’ve become the heat
in every whisper that aches to be scream,
every dream punched into a keyboard at 2:47 a.m.,
between despair and tomorrow.

We bathe, yes— but with eyes
open for the next knock,
the next Charlotte hiding behind cause.

And when we rise, wrinkled but willing,
we take your pen—not as weapon,
but as wound, as reminder, as promise:
The page is not done with us yet.

About This Poem

Review Request Intensity: I appreciate moderate constructive criticism

Editing Stage: Editing - rough draft

About the Author

Region, Country: West Moreton, AUS

Favorite Poets: There is nothing quite as boring as a life completely devoid of shadows.

More from this author

Comments

neopoet

neopoet

4 months 1 week ago

Neopoet AI [2025-04]

The below is a computer-generated response from Neo, Neopoet’s AI:

This poem effectively intertwines historical reference with contemporary reflection, creating a layered meditation on activism, legacy, and the endurance of revolutionary spirit. The invocation of Marat—a figure famously associated with martyrdom and radical change—anchors the poem in a rich symbolic past, while the transition to present-day imagery (flooded inboxes, push notifications, algorithms) situates the reader firmly in the digital age’s challenges to meaningful engagement.

The opening stanza’s sensory details—the “steaming bath,” “ink staining the surface like blood’s rehearsal”—are vivid and evocative, blending the physical and metaphorical in a way that sets a somber, urgent tone. The metaphor of the pulse “writing pamphlets” is particularly striking, suggesting that Marat’s very life was an act of communication and resistance.

The poem’s structure, with its shifts between past and present, and its use of rhetorical questions (“What use is a quill now, Marat?”) invites the reader into a dialogue, emphasizing the tension between historical modes of protest and modern forms of expression. This tension is well-articulated and resonates throughout the poem.

The concluding stanzas offer a nuanced resolution: the pen is “not as weapon, but as wound, as reminder, as promise,” which reframes activism not as a simple battle but as an ongoing, sometimes painful commitment. The final line, “The page is not done with us yet,” is a powerful closing image that suggests continuity and hope.

Areas for further consideration:

1. **Pacing and Line Breaks:** Some lines carry significant weight and might benefit from more deliberate pacing through line breaks or stanza divisions. For example, the dense middle section could be broken up to enhance readability and emphasize key ideas.

2. **Tone Consistency:** While the poem balances solemnity and urgency well, moments like “the revolution reduced to a push notification” introduce a slightly ironic tone. Clarifying whether this irony is intended as critique or lament could sharpen the poem’s emotional impact.

3. **Imagery Expansion:** The metaphor of “lukewarm waters of exhausted hope” is evocative but could be expanded or paired with additional sensory details to deepen the emotional texture of contemporary disillusionment.

4. **Clarifying “Charlotte”:** The reference to “the next Charlotte hiding behind cause” is intriguing but somewhat opaque. Providing more context or a clearer allusion could strengthen this image’s resonance.

Overall, the poem succeeds in weaving historical and modern threads into a compelling reflection on activism’s persistence. Attention to pacing and certain clarifications could enhance its clarity and emotional depth.

Please send feedback about Neo (our AI critique system) to neopoet.com/contact

Geezer

Geezer

4 months 1 week ago

Having never...

heard of Marat, I went to look him up. A great portrayal of the life and legacy of a martyr. I like the definition, the vision that you bring to our era of electronic protest. Scrolling and thrusting our way through the vagaries of our political arenas, do we have an advantage? Nicely done, Geez.

.

Frederick Kesner

Frederick Kesner

4 months ago

Thanks Geez. The history…

Thanks Geez. The history itself is very interesting but as you have most generously noted, swinging that to speak on our time and day gives it more opportunity at cross-dimensional depth and texture. Thanks kindly 🙏🏻🕊️