A Killer Dinner...

An invitation to dinner
How sweet that surely is
Me, this tired old sinner?
Oh golly me and gee-whiz

What shall I wear, my finest frock?
I'm all a frenzy and a'twitter
I'm looking at the speeding clock
Glad that I don't need a sitter

To make it such a special night
I'm sure you have things planned
Oh, my hair is such a fright!
He's gonna ask for my little hand!

I know it's a special invitation
I really couldn't be more pleased
Will there be a wine libation?
Shall I bring some fancy cheese?

"Recipes from the around the world
astounding travels and delicious meals
Come with me, my dearest girl
Yes, I know just how you feel"

No franks and beans, grilled, ground meat
nothing quite so grim
We'll have prime rib, exotic treats
you'll have to give up being trim

Gravies, sauces and batter-dip
I love condiments too
Be careful dear, don't burn your lip
It's so unseemly when you drool

"I am so glad", she says to me
As she presses closer to the pot
She really thought I didn't see
I pretend that I did not

She tried to poison this crafty Killer
she thinks I didn't know
But, I know how to play this thriller
and she's just a little slow

So now she's done, medium-rare
The main course of dinner it seems
It was a chore, plucking hair
but it was the stuff of dreams.