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faithmairee
faithmairee
Jun 18, 2011 ⭐ See this poem's read count — a supporter feature

flooding river

forbidden waters
makes one weak
a drowning man
knows no peace
flooding river
winding down
like a warden
grants no release

flooding river
gonna take my home
leave me
naked and alone
mean old river
so unkind
shows no mercy
leaves nothin' behind

— faithmairee, Jun 18, 2011

About This Poem

Review Request Direction: How was my language use?
What did you think of the rhythm or pattern or pacing?
How does this theme appeal to you?
[This option has been removed]

Review Request Intensity: I appreciate moderate constructive criticism

Editing Stage: Rough draft

About the Author

Region, Country: Florida, United States, USA

Favorite Poets: Lawrence Ferlinghetti, Edna St. Vincent Millay, Lucille Clifton and Elizabeth Bishop

More from this author

Critiques

faithmairee

faithmairee

15 years 1 month ago

Dear Rosi

Thank you for your wonderful remarks. Your suggestion is a good one, On the surface this poem appears to be about a river but as Lonnie has guessed there is a hidden meaning just below the surface.

Thank you for your supportiveness, Rosi.

Love ya-

Faith

S

scribbler

15 years 1 month ago

hi

Every time I try to write about a flood the poem takes longer that the event lol. You have done well describing consequences in few words. Only trip: waters make or water makes .......................stan

faithmairee

faithmairee

15 years 1 month ago

Dear Stan

Thank you so much for stopping by and responding to my poem. This poem is not really about a river flooding over. But thank you for the lovely compliment anyway. I do appreciate your being here.

Love-Faith

Eduardo Cruz

Eduardo Cruz

15 years 1 month ago

Faith

Well done and to the point.
Enjoyed the read.
I was wondering if you would like to join my new workshop, on poetry different forms of writing. I think you would enjoy it and get a lot out of it.
It's not time comsuming or hard.
please honor me with your agreement to join "Writing Forms workshop"

Eddie

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