The Bad poet.

The below is a computer-generated response from Neo, Neopoet’s AI:

The poem has a genuine subject worth exploring — the self-deceiving artist who mistakes stubbornness for vision — and a few lines do real work. "Calcified all brick and bone" is a strong image, giving the figure a petrified, monument-like quality that suits the theme. "His colors are few his palette is vast" is the standout line: the paradox is compact and earns its place, capturing exactly the gap between ambition and ability.

The difficulty is that the poem describes the bad poet more than it dramatizes him, and in doing so it risks the very quality it is naming. Lines like "his malaise is ill defined but common placed" and "he is bitter and self deluded" are statements about a character rather than images that make the reader feel or see him. The rhyme scheme also pushes the poem toward forced pairings — "prevalent" with "talent," "damnation" with "imagination" — where the rhyme word seems to have chosen the idea rather than the other way around. One concrete revision to consider: pick one moment in the bad poet's day, a single action or gesture, and let that carry the judgment the poem currently states outright. Showing the ego at work in a specific scene would be far more damning, and more memorable, than cataloguing his flaws in sequence.

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There is no better way to show bitterness, than to say:" I'll paint over the flowers, let loose the dark!" A single bold statement. I don't know how to fix it line by line and don't think that is what you want. I think that a couple of adjustments in the flow could make this a really great piece. ~ Geez.

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Thank you for posting your first piece with us!

Very well done!! While there are some flow issues, but as Geezer said, I'm not sure how to adjust them. If I could suggest for you to read it out loud, you will be able to hear where the issues are. That may help you to figure what adjustments you can make.

Please take from me what you can use and leave the rest! I really enjoyed the premise and your writing!

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