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L

Juxtaposiion

                    Juxtaposition



                Just now I heard the clock un-tick
                and thought it very strange
                that timelessness could be so sick
                or quick to rearrange
                my concept of reality
                with which I wrestle when
                my mind ignores normality
                on which it should depend

                Insanity can be a tool
                or it can be a curse
                depending on how fast a fool
                can go from bad to worse
                so as I walk new paths of dream
                into parts unknown
                my alter-ego starts to scream
                afraid to be alone

                I pierce a veil of time and space
                no soul has breached before
                and there, come standing face to face,
                with Albert Einstein's whore
                just then I heard the clock un-tick
                and thought it very strange
                that timelessness could be so sick
                or quick to rearrange.......


                C.  Lon  R.  Bruso
               

               

     
— Lonnie, Jul 15, 2010

About This Poem

About the Author

Region, Country: New England, originally, now, Macon, N.C., USA

Favorite Poets: Poe, Frost, Bob Dylan

More from this author

Critiques

Rett

Rett

15 years 10 months ago

Dang it Lonnie

Can't you ever write something bad? How am I supposed to critique something that flows smooth as melted butter. The rhythm and rhyme were great and I loved the subject and the way you ended as you began. Respectfully, Rett: “Anyone who sacrifices liberty for security deserves neither.” Benjamin Franklin
L

Lonnie

15 years 10 months ago

Thanks, Rett!

This one was a bit off-beat for me, subject-wise, but I guess it works! Thanks so much for coming by to read and leave a nice comment!
Candlewitch

Candlewitch

15 years 10 months ago

Dear Lonnie

Love the title and the pacing. The theme is priceless. Only you could think up such a thing! I can see the hands of the clock moving backwards. But then, I'm a little on the unstable side of sanity. My favorite lines: Insanity can be a tool or it can be a curse depending on how fast a fool can go from bad to worse so as I walk new paths of dream into parts unknown my alter-ego starts to scream afraid to be alone Always, eddy/cat
L

Lonnie

15 years 10 months ago

Thank you, Cat!

and aren't we all just a tad unstable? LOL!! Actually, I think that's what makes us write as well as we do! Anyways, thanks again for the kind words!
Professor Purple

Professor Purple

15 years 10 months ago

A great one!

I agree with Rett, except for one "weak" rhyme: when-depend. Perhaps replace "with which I wrestle when" with "which I must try to rend" It does change the meaning of that line but not of the overall poem. Also, "into parts unknown" seems to miss a beat, it still flows well so I didn't catch it at first read, but perhaps "into strange parts unknown" or "straight into parts unknown". I'd go with the second one, after reading myself, but you choose, you have two suggestions for the same thing. But otherwise yeah, superb! The pacing is great, somehow I can't read it slowly. The title fits, and the theme appeals to me, not an easy one but you pulled it off. Congrats! Antoine Edit: I agree with Cat too, she beat me to the "post comment" button, and also she reminds me: second stanza's also my favourite. And I just noticed: no "t" in "Juxtaposiion"?
L

Lonnie

15 years 10 months ago

Thanks, Antoine!

I'll study on the changes you have proposed and, who knows, I may just decide you're right! Anyhow, thanks for the read and the comment!
Roscoe Lane

Roscoe Lane

15 years 10 months ago

Perfect,

poetry absolutely brilliant, a joy to read and unread. Future to the back poet's unwritten yet poem, Disregards Roscoe...
L

Lonnie

15 years 10 months ago

Thank you, Roscoe!

It's always nice to hear from you and get your opinion on something I have come up with! Glad you enjoyed this one!
LZ

Lil Z

15 years 10 months ago

Awesome!

Haha I was kind of skeptical when I saw this title, but you always seem to make it work! Sincerely, Lil Z
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Lonnie

15 years 10 months ago

Thanks, Lil Z!

Your feedback is always a pleasure to receive, and I thank you so muchfor taking time to read this and leave a nice comment! Glad you liked it!
S

scribbler

15 years 10 months ago

physics

second poem concerning quantum mechanics that I've read today !That settles it,I'm to dumb to be a poet.LOL Yawn...another in an endless line of good poems.Ho hum,I should just get a rubber stamp.....scribbler
L

Lonnie

15 years 10 months ago

Thank you, Stan!

Never mind the rubber stamp, how about some rubber boots to wade through the you know what? LOL!! Hey, seriously, thanks so much for coming by to read and leave a kind word or two, it means a lot, believe me!
P

poewriter58

15 years 10 months ago

Lon

"And the white night is talking backwards" There is one line that stands out as I read " My alter ego starts to scream afraid to be alone" what a mind, which has scribed such a line outstanding as it says so very much. I stand with Rett and Stan Do you know how to write bad so we may sink our teeth into it? Love Ya Dear(lol I just thought of our mutual friend)
L

Lonnie

15 years 10 months ago

Thank you, Dearest!

This was a bit off-beat for me, but I am pleased that it pleased you! Doing that always makes me happy!
Seren

Seren

15 years 10 months ago

Dear Lonnie

You are a master of words my friend ... I cant pick favourite lines they are all wonderful bravo (again lol) love and big hugs JayCee x
L

Lonnie

15 years 10 months ago

Thanks JayCee!

Your feedback is always most welcome, and coveted by many! I am pleased that you enjoyed this piece and thank you for reading and commenting!
loved

loved

15 years 10 months ago

u r so wonderful

i keep my eyes glued to my page perhaps u may have scanned it by mistake i am no poet that's my take but to become one i have a stake and make no mistake as Bush did once say help me become one if you may if you may if you may LOVED HOPEFUL POET