Dennis Go

Jul 10, 2010 ⭐ See this poem's read count — a supporter feature

I Fed The World My Tears

I fed the world my tears
With sobs of wile and woe.
Sternly, I faced my fears
To hearts of young and old.

Youth shows half the truth
Of crimson colors wild.
The spirit voice's mute,
As songs of aging lie.

Until such life's at peace,
Till all the splendid hailed;
With tears my eyes will speak
Of capsized wishes feigned.

— Dennis Go, Jul 10, 2010

About the Author

Region, Country: Manila, PHL

Favorite Poets: R.S. Thomas, William Blake, Emily Dickinson, Dylan Thomas

Critiques

xena465

16 years ago

Dear Dennis

Wonderful...just so lovely...great title. Xena Quote: Science is what you know; philosophy is what you don't know. - Bertrand Russell

Dennis Go

16 years ago

:)

Thanks Xena

raskin

16 years ago

Content is good, pacing is a

Content is good, pacing is a little off. Last line in second stanza is lighter than the other three lines, same with the last one. raskin

Dennis Go

16 years ago

Thanks for the evaluation

Thanks for the comment. Although I'm really not that technically gifted to understand your terms. Thanks for the evaluation though.

raskin

16 years ago

Nah, I’m not technically

Nah, I'm not technically gifted at all. I count syllables on my fingers. It's like your missing a beat. raskin

Dennis Go

16 years ago

ah ok

ah I see but I did not intend it to be that way. thanks for the observation though :)

magics02

16 years ago

Nice poem here

Hello Dennis this is a nice little write of yours. I do not think I have met you or read you before so I am glad to find you. I shall visit again to read your works. I am curious to know of your picture here if I may ask can you tell me what it is with a bottle and it looks like a firework in the middle and then I see pieces of fence and a red thing so I am in awe at what that can be. If you will please let me know okay? thanks. And to your poem I especially liked and share these lines with you: Sternly, I faced my fears To hearts of young and old. Very nice thought here Magics Mona or Mona Magics LOL

Dennis Go

16 years ago

Thanks Mona

Nice to meet you and I'm glad you like this piece. About the picture its not the least bit of what you think. The "fences" are not actually fences they're just pieces of paper or wood (I think) forming a Chinese word. In this case the Chinese character "Death". At the bottom is a candle, and I actually don't know the red dot. I think this picture is taken from a cemetery. :)

magics02

16 years ago

I see and yes

I would love to know what the symbolic meaning of it is in the Chinese culture. Did you take it? You got me curious now lol and I shall visit you again Dennis. Nice to meet you also Peace Mona

Dennis Go

16 years ago

Hmm symbolic meaning?

Maybe the mourning of death? Lighting a candle for death? haha I don't really know :)

Seren

16 years ago

Dear Dennis

I agree with raskins observation ... there is a beat missing but that last line ? I have line envy lol wonderful love JayCee (Quote~~"It is by universal misunderstanding that all agree. For if, by ill luck, people understood each other, they would never agree. "--Charles Baudelaire)

Dennis Go

16 years ago

Thanks for the observation

Thanks for your observation. But like I said to raskin, I didn't count syllables in this. It is not really supposed to be metered at 6 syllables per line. What goes with the thought is what really matters. Thanks JayCee :)

Mari Shine

16 years ago

I have so enjoyed reading

I have so enjoyed reading this superb inking Dennis. It is a wonderful metaphoric write and to me it has perfect rhythm and rhyme. Your poem flows so smoothly, it enhances the write. Fine imagery flecks each line and the poem is beautifully expressed. Your work, as always, is a true joy to read Dennis and I thank you for so very kindly sharing it with me. Beautiful work! Bless you, dear friend.

Dennis Go

16 years ago

Thanks Mari :)

Join Neopoet to leave a critique

Neopoet is a free community of poets who critique and support each other's writing.

Join free Log in