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M
mantiscepter
Jul 05, 2010 ⭐ View statistics (Premium feature)

Love Rings

       Sitting beside
      a rippling brook
       thinking once
    of a walk we took
     together in love
     a world so bright
     laughter for each
    the beautiful sights
 the feelings of comfort
 with the love that I held
the moments of sharing
   they rang like a bell
— mantiscepter, Jul 05, 2010

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Country/Region: USA

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Critiques

B

blistered-pen

15 years 11 months ago

Sitting beside a rippling

Sitting beside a rippling brook thinking once of a walk [that] we took together in love [in] a world so bright laughter for each [of] the beautiful sights the feelings of comfort with the love that I held the moments of sharing they rang like a bell I just added a few words that helped with the flow in my mind but I like this, the imagery is there and the feeling of that easy love is easily transferred. I think everyone that has had one of those easy loves/flings/relationships has been on one of those entirely satisfying completely casual but chemically charged walks with the other half and will be able to relate to and enjoy this. JRS
M

mantiscepter

15 years 11 months ago

Bells

Again we meet thanx again for your time to stop and give a read.I do listen to comments and I'm happy to hear someone thinks the poems worth enough to try to improve on its base wording, or form. your a gem thanx. Mantiscepter.
xena465

xena465

15 years 11 months ago

Hiya John

My bells are ringing. I've had a few nice walks like that, but not for a long time, thanks for the nice memories sweetheart. Lovely write. Xena Mrs John xxx Quote: Science is what you know; philosophy is what you don't know. - Bertrand Russell
M

mantiscepter

15 years 11 months ago

love rings

Hiya, right back to you. again thanx for the read. and I'm happy you liked this one. I wrote it to show seren that sometimes the poems represent a shape, like in this case a bell. so I hope she sees it and understands.. thanx again Love John.
M

mantiscepter

15 years 11 months ago

love rings

Hi Mona, How the heck are ya? It's been awhile, good to see your still busy and rolling thru the site. thanx for reading and commenting on this poem, kinda sweet and nice like you. anyway I appreciate it. so see you soon. Love John.