FISHING INSTRUCTIONS

                         * based on actual conversation

I remember way back in my teens
   long,long before stretch waist jeans
   I was doing just a bit of work
   for a man named Lewis Merk

He was building self a home
   where he retired no more to roam
   a contemporary on the lake
   e'en had a dock for goodness sake

I'd worked enough for him in past
   to form a friendship that was fast
   as we worked we'd joke around
   thus leading where this tale is bound

On his dock sat rod and reel
   but no fish stringer or creel
   "Do you fish?"I chanced to ask
   in middle of my middling task

"Well"he said "I'll tell you Stan
   I go each evening if I can."
   "Usually I go after chow
   pay heed and I'll tell you how"

Since my rod and reel is there
   just have to carry beer and chair
   down to the dock before sunset
   I sit in chair, thats not all yet

I like to use a real cork float
   but sometimes plastic gets my vote
   and then tie on a good sized hook
   thats sharp, I never fail to look

My line is always 12 pound test
   monofilament is the best
   to which I clamp a small split shot
   oh! and I almost forgot

I always keep a drink in reach
   and cast my hook far from the beach
   soon I close my eyes and then
   the real fishing does soon begin

Well,I asked if he would add
   what bait he used to this young lad
   he then looked at me kind of funny
   then he said"Listen here sonny."

"I don't put Any bait on hook
   hardly ever at the float I look
   'cause if I caught a fish perhaps
   it would disturb my evening naps !"