JosephSommers

Jun 24, 2010 ⭐ See this poem's read count — a supporter feature

Love Is

Jealousy and lust Jealousy and lust Is there such a thing as love Even when there is no trust What is love Could it be without lust Could it be without jealousy Is it jealousy from lack of trust If you love someone there must be lust If you love someone there must be trust So why is there jealousy Maybe it is only wanting you with me Can not be one with out the other In this circle they all come together If your asking me what is love It is simply, Jealousy and Lust with a little bit of trust.

— JosephSommers, Jun 24, 2010

Critiques

lou

16 years 1 month ago

Joey

Was this brought to mind by our discussion? Great idea , but too many repeatitions of the words lust and jealousy. The third and fourth stanzas could say ' If you love someone there must be a little of each, So why the mistrust, Is it only wanting you ,Can one be without the other, In this circle they all come together, If your asking what is love? It is simply all three'. love lou xx

JosephSommers

16 years 1 month ago

Lou

Yes it was Lou. I was actually thinking about what we was talking about and it came to me. I'm actually a fan of repetition in writing. Sometimes it helps get the main point across. Some people really hate it tho. That would be a great topic in one of our late night chat sessions. :)

lou

16 years 1 month ago

Personal Taste

Obviously it comes down to personal taste , when reading a poem, I just happen to prefer less repeation. But it was only a suggestion , not a hard and fast rule. much love lou xx

greeneyes

16 years 1 month ago

I liked it. Sometimes the

I liked it. Sometimes the repeition is the coolest part, dont listen to lou, there is no rules in freeform.

lou

16 years 1 month ago

Suggestion

it was a suggestion , nobody said it was the rule, lou xx

JosephSommers

16 years 1 month ago

Green Eyes

Thanks Green Eyes. Also I really liked your blog..lol

xena465

16 years 1 month ago

Hi Joseph

Lust and Trust...a big thing in a relationship. Sometimes it's the lust in us that leads some of us to stray, and then one wee mistake can kill the trust indefinitely...Great poem. PS. Wow what a scary picture you’ve uploaded, but I like it. Xena Quote: Science is what you know; philosophy is what you don't know. - Bertrand Russell

JosephSommers

16 years 1 month ago

Warrior Princess

Xena you are so right. Once you break that trust you can never get it back. No matter how hard you try its ruined. Glad to see you again.

reepa

16 years 1 month ago

HI

Something weve all known at somepoint, a good topic.

JosephSommers

16 years 1 month ago

Reppa

Yes indeed Reppa.Thanks for reading.

RolaytraLynn

16 years 1 month ago

Great Poem

I actually just posted a comment on my own work about how too much repetition can be boring but I say it was just perfect in your poem. I really liked it even if it did only come to you in 30 seconds. I've had good poetry come out of nowhere it seems, and a lot of the times it is better than a poem you've sat for an hour trying to get out of your head. My favorite part is: "So why is there jealousy Maybe it is only wanting you with me" I don't really know why but it just is.

JosephSommers

16 years 1 month ago

Thanks Lynn

Thanks you for the great comment. I know just what you mean about repetition and how it can make a write boring. I remember years ago in writing class they taut against it. lol Then again sometimes it just sounds right.

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