Big Red, The Pancake eater...

It was Leon's birthday

On the camp-grounds by the lake

He just wanted a quiet night, on the grill he had some steaks

Missy and Chrissy, were raising hell

The air was hot and steamy

The wife lives up to her name...They call her 'Screamin' Mimi'

Why can't we have a quiet night, like some other folks?

Without my 'Screamin' Mimi' , getting mad and stoked?

In the A.M.... eating pancakes, the contest is tomorrow

I'm 'Big Red' when I go to eat, but my heart is filled with sorrow

I really need to sleep, or I can't be my best

My stomach  saying... Hey..." I gotta have some rest"

The camp-grounds are a mad house

Kids are running to and fro

Don't need the quiet of a mouse

Just no screamin', don't you know?

Here comes the light of  dawn, and I couldn't sleep a wink

Big Red, is my name, but my stomach starts to sink

Suddenly... things went blank on me, I saw all shades of red

When I came back to myself... there were all kinds of dead

They say I went real insane

Chopping limbs and stabbing hearts

People screaming out my name

Me... farting pancake farts

I used the fork, to stab my foes

Hit them with the skillet

I broke the table with the judge's nose

Yelling, "There's another....Kill it!"

Next year, I think... I'm sure to win first-place

The competition ain't no big shakes

I should be the favored ace

At the prison-house in 'Great Lakes'