flooding river

forbidden waters
makes one weak
a drowning man
knows no peace
flooding river
winding down
like a warden
grants no release

flooding river's
gonna take my home
leave me naked
and so alone
mean old river
so unkind
shows no mercy
leaves nothing behind

— faithmairee, Jun 22, 2010

About This Poem

About the Author

Region, Country: Florida, United States, USA

Favorite Poets: Lawrence Ferlinghetti, Edna St. Vincent Millay, Lucille Clifton and Elizabeth Bishop

Critiques

themoonman

15 years 11 months ago

Hi Faithmairee...

Welcome to the site. I hope you are enjoying yourself so far. It was nice meeting you in chat and hope to see more of you on the site. Your poem here, the critique choices are interesting, I always go with "give the raw truth" so the other poets will at least feel free to give me their view of a write... but I understand the need for choices as well. I like the poem, the title is good as well as the theme. The only other thing I could mention comes under the heading of "mechanics", so I won't... but for me was a good read, thanks for posting if you need any help getting around the site, just ask, I'd be glad to help. Richard

faithmairee

15 years 11 months ago

Thank you

I appreciate your comments...thanks so much for taking the time to read this poem and for your friendship...i enjoyed chatting with you as well Faith

xena465

15 years 11 months ago

I love it

It describes to me the destruction, pain and misery that a raging river can bring upon us...well done Faith Xena Quote: Science is what you know; philosophy is what you don't know. - Bertrand Russell

faithmairee

15 years 11 months ago

Thank You

Thank you for your wonderful remarks. They are greatly appreciated. Faith I never say anything I don't mean nor do I say anything to be mean.

hobo

15 years 11 months ago

Wow

Wow this is really good, I actually had 2 friends drown in a river, at different times in different rivers but both drowned. the river can be very unforgiving. nice write You can never pick anyone up if you are busy putting them down

faithmairee

15 years 11 months ago

Thank You

I am realy sorry to hear you lost two friends by drowning. That is really sad to hear. I appreciate your kind words though. I never say anything I don't mean nor do I say anything to be mean.

Atticus

15 years 11 months ago

I believe you captured that

I believe you captured that ole' river as best could be. Nice work. all the best, Nathaniel

faithmairee

15 years 11 months ago

Thanks Much

Thank you for your wonderful remarks, Nathaniel. They are very much appreciated. ~I never say anything I don't mean nor do I say anything to be mean.~