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Kingdom of faint hearts...

Kingdom of the faint hearts…

We stand and guard their castles rocks and ermine,
when in truth we should be rid of our vermin.

Who would watch while others,
do their labour.
ungracious to the living,
they feel beneath their reign.
And robe their selves in best,
of all they favour.
regardless of the cost,
and so immune,
to whoever it may pain.
 
Do we need their lead,
have we not sense or eyes.
And in doing their deed,
make more the offence,
and give life,
to their lies.

Was we born to live,
or be ruled,
with iron rod.
Can we not forgive,
the fool,
that cast our shackles,
and shoes,
that their horse is shod.

We rely on each other,
in our real,
times of need.
We are not their brother,
they only deal,
to the highest of breed.

So now give voice to liberty,
and cease living a life,
ruled by pedigree.
— Roscoe Lane, Jun 20, 2010

About This Poem

About the Author

Region, Country: Scotland, Ayrshire land of Burns.., GBR

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Critiques

K

Klirbok

15 years 11 months ago

Thanks for the piece. Always

Thanks for the piece. Always good to read a bit a bit of revolutionary rhyming. Thoughts if you don't object 1)There is pretence at a rhyming structure but it is not really strong enough. First stanza X A X B X A X B - Second A B half-B X X B, etc Each stanza is different. Fourth is stricter and thus better. Is there a touch of sense following rhyme 2) Rhythm Very little - this is a kind of rhyming free form Advice Do read Shelley. He is both revolutionary and a brilliant and strict controller of the Spenserian stanza Thanks for this piece.
Roscoe Lane

Roscoe Lane

15 years 11 months ago

I will,

take your advice and read Shelley, but i think this time i'll leave the poem as it is. I wrote this with a little anger, and i think when i originally tidied it up it lost something. Thanks for taking time to comment. Regards Roscoe
xena465

xena465

15 years 11 months ago

Dear Roscoe

Words of the wise and wisdom...I love it. Xena Quote: Science is what you know; philosophy is what you don't know. - Bertrand Russell