Join the Neopoet online poetry workshop and community to improve as a writer, meet fellow poets, and showcase your work. Sign up, submit your poetry, and get started.

I Wish To Write

I wish to write like:
     
      the scent of perfume

           with oohs and ahs 
           to accompany the waft
           of each and every word
        
I wish to write like:

       the taste of  guilty pleasures

             marinated, familiarly spiced words 
             easy to swallow
             leaving you wanting for more

 I wish to write like:

        the sound of  doppling trains in the night

               transposing the mundane
               into images of romance
               and dreams of farther horizons

I wish to write like:

          the sight of the Grand Canyon

                 words deeply seated
                 in a massive
                 and truly majestic vision

I wish to write like:

           the feeling of Being

                 sparse in words
                 unafraid
                 confident in the unequivocal right to be
— brittle light, Jun 18, 2010

About This Poem

About the Author

Region, Country: upstate New York USA, USA

More from this author

Critiques

R

raskin

15 years 11 months ago

Change in form makes a huge

Change in form makes a huge difference. Nice emphasis on the imagery and I think the ending is strong. raskin
brittle light

brittle light

15 years 11 months ago

thank you the change in

thank you the change in form was actually the origanl form I wanted to submit, but the page expired. In re-typing I did't want to waste time(I'm a slow typer), just had to submit it ungroomed, and then, immediately edit it into it's present look. You happened to see it first in the raw state. But I agree. The look can, and did, make a huge difference. thank you for confirming that notion. thanks for the bit on imagery and the ending. I think saying any more will surely expose my tendency for long windedness. I'll read up on your work as soon as time permits. AL
Kailashana

Kailashana

15 years 11 months ago

“the feeling of

"the feeling of Being".... Alive. Passionate. In love with love in all its forms, all its *guilty pleasures*. Who could ask for more? ~ The ultimate measure of a man is not where he stands in moments of comfort, but where he stands at times of challenge and controversy. ~ Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr.
D

Damo

15 years 11 months ago

Desire to write

It seems that writing of your wish to write has made your wish come true.
B

barbsdad2003

15 years 11 months ago

How ...

incredibly insightful, sensitive, and, yes, even raw. Thanx again, Chuck PS: I'd prefer truely spelled truly. Also, modern preference usually falls in favor of oohs and ahs over the apostrophe'd versions. But for all that, I'd label this a for-sure pluperfect piece, a best example of free verse, of freed-up poetry sourced from Old Soul. A by-golly treasure here.
M

Marie-I-Be

15 years 11 months ago

superb

I agree that this is superb. I enjoyed it very much. There is a breathtaking quality to both the visual and the content. Your piece looks great after you made the spelling corrections offered by Chuck. If you wish to tidy up a bit further and move toward perfection, I urge you to remove the extra space each on line 7 and on line 12, to remove the extra colon after line 16, and to correct the misspelling on the last line from "unequivical" to unequivocal. Have you tried capitalizing Grand Canyon? I'm not sure what is contributed by lowercasing it, although maybe there is something in the feel of that for you. If you uppercase it, I think no impact or effectiveness would be lost in your capitalization of Being. I love your avatar and the handle Brittle Light.