Darkness Revealed (sun and moon)

Sun and moon you give me light, you illuminate the darkness

You know my secrets and my fears

You reveal my true self the one with the face tainted with tears

You are my greatest rival

You know all my weaknesses

You were here before me

You'll be here when I'm gone

You know my evil intentions

You see the darkness that surrounds me

Always Watching

Never Ending

— xXsierraXx, May 31, 2010

About This Poem

About the Author

Country/Region: USA

Critiques

xena465

16 years ago

Welcome Xx

I love this write. I guess we all have our dark days but like you say, the Sun and the Moon can see all our secrets and if we can get past those hard times we survive. There are just a couple of wee typos... {Yo'll} be here when I'm gone ……[You’ll] You know {mt} evil intentions ………[my] Rosina xena465

xXsierraXx

16 years ago

thanks

thanks that helps a lot i guess i should proof read it before i submit lol im glad you liked it Sierra XxsierraxX

weirdelf

16 years ago

good first post!

a couple of little things you might want to look at Sun and moon you give me light, you illuminate the darkness [maybe break into two lines] You reveal my true self the one with the face tainted with tears [maybe] You reveal my true self, face tainted with tears [did you mean painted?] just suggestions, Cheers, Jess, Reprehensibly irrepressible, "the alleged short-cut to knowledge, which is faith, is only a short-circuit destroying the mind." [Ayn Rand, Atlas Shrugged]

xXsierraXx

16 years ago

well i meant tainted as in

well i meant tainted as in stained but i guess i should have put stained i cant wait until tomorrow so i can post a new poem and see what every on thinks thanks for commenting Sierra

weirdelf

16 years ago

tainted is fine, quite poetic. I'd stick with it.

Cheers, Jess, Reprehensibly irrepressible, "the alleged short-cut to knowledge, which is faith, is only a short-circuit destroying the mind." [Ayn Rand, Atlas Shrugged]

Moloko D. Mahuma

16 years ago

Simple and Beautiful

I guess that's what they mean when they say, "Simplicity is the best". I love your beautiful poem, keep it up. Regards, Moloko