Along an Unintended Path

Along an Unintended Path

A sacred acre in the wood
Stands testament to opulence.
For here in trees of bounty bright
Are blossoms of prosperity,
Sapphire Summer, Ruby Autumn,
Diamond Winter, Emerald Spring.
Like dreams of budding charity
They scent our nascent jubilance.
Though should we once scorn the harvest
And lonely let the flowers die,
A spark of life will leave this world
And gravel dull be our reward.

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Motivation and Focus

This was written as an example for a critique I did and as I did not hate it I decided to keep it.  Originally it was an eight line effort but I did not care for the abrupt transition from line six to seven and upon a few days reflection decided another four lines would let me both tell the story better and end it with a clearer message.

It’s tetrameter blank verse and the inspiration was my take on a fruit tree on Flatearth.  It had to be short and since it was short I found blank rather than rhymed verse was able to serve the vision best.  For although I am a huge fan of rhymed verse, quickly written rhymed verse and short rhymed verse can cause a bit of suffering for the reader and rarely creates something the poet will look back at with pride.

Blank verse can descend into lecture, so there is no good answer for the poet except to edit carefully and be willing to admit that sometimes what we write is crap and needs to be modified or discarded in order for it not to depend on the good will of the reader to finish reading a poem.  My goal is to always assume a hostile reader.  This is someone who is only reading under duress and to get them to finish reading the poem, I must pull them through it.  I must speak with them rather than at them and let them know that I believe their time is important.  And although this will not be successful for every person reading my work, as long as my target audience hears this message, I consider the poem a success.

A side note here.  The process I use to create is a flash and refine type of thing. Normally a vision  bursts into my mind and I work carefully and meticulously to transfer what I see into what I want others to see.  Many people are a fan of the whole “stream of consciousness” thing.  While I am happy for them, I am not a fan of the concept and prefer my approach.

This is not a moral judgement, it is merely a preference.