magics02

May 04, 2010 ⭐ See this poem's read count — a supporter feature

OCEANS DECLINE

Ocean's decline
Of the fisherman's line
Elimination from oil's tear
Sea life, once again fear
The seas, the fish, it's core
Gallons of oil drift upon shores

The aquatic life
Why oh why
Oil seeping
Poisoning, weeping
Fish dying
Seabirds crying

Oceans decline
Of the fishermen's line
Sea life perish
Waters we cherish
Man's mistakes
Running into the lakes

The aquatic life
Why oh why
Oil seeping
Poisoning, weeping
Fish dying
Seabirds crying

MMS 5.4.10

In light of recent events in the beautiful gulf we are forever reminded of the damage to sealife itself, the fishermen, the seashores, pristine beaches.. Once again....

— magics02, May 04, 2010

About the Author

Region, Country: USA - Florida, USA

Favorite Poets: :)

Critiques

Seren

16 years 2 months ago

Dear Mona

WOW what A different poem from you I really thought with recent events, a great social consciousness poem ... well done five for moving out of your comfort zone and I can see you did love and hugs Jayne-Chloe ("Quote:-For every beauty there is an eye somewhere to see it. For every truth there is an ear somewhere to hear it. For every love there is a heart somewhere to receive it.-Ivan Panin")

magics02

16 years 2 months ago

Thank you so much

YOu know Jayne while I was writing this one I knew I was coming out of something, and yes as you put it my usual stuff. It is horrifying to know what this incident will do for many years to come now. My son and I talked about it and his love of fishing and many others in the family. I think of the poor sealife will suffer along with other matters this has disturbed the waters. Thank you so much for the comment and the stars. Love Mona xoxox TIME well spent is TIME well lived

xena465

16 years 2 months ago

Superb Mona

I agree with JayCee all the way...your best write so far...very moving. Rosina xena465

magics02

16 years 2 months ago

Why I am happy for the comments this morning

Thank you Rosina as I pondered on the waters last night and the horribleness of all the damage this oil spilling out will ruin many a life, sealife and mankind's livelihood. Thank you for star studded comments Love, Mona xoxoxoxo TIME well spent is TIME well lived

magics02

16 years 2 months ago

Thanking Indi for all you said

I shall think about that one. It is terrible and in Florida it will affect many things especially all the beautiful fish, dolphins etc. Someone should really be held responsible for not acting so swiftly in the stopping of this oil still spilling out. Only leaves one to wonder, wonder.. Thanks again for the comments, I do so appreciate it very much and yes if your going to buy any fish or eat out at any fish restaurant it says only for the next few weeks. I think the beaches here will be ruined for a long time now and that makes me ill.. you gave me 15 stars I must of did something write..lol Mona Grazie TIME well spent is TIME well lived

chumfin

16 years 2 months ago

GREAT WORK FOR THE WORLD!

MONA A SUPERB WORK HERE, I LIKE THE ACTIVIST IN YOU. YOU ARE A POETIC ACTIVIST FOR THE ENVIRONMENT, I RESPECT WHAT YOU STAND FOR . CHUMFIN

magics02

16 years 2 months ago

Thank you Chum

Poetic activist that was different and I appreciate your visit this morning and I am happy that you liked the poem Chum. Thank you for the stars wow I also see this poem got a nomination, I hardly ever see that on my work, and love that more then the stars and comments. You all had me wake up with a smile and know i did go out of my zone a little but brang it all home in the end. And with much thougth into it as that is how I felt when I wrote it..thanks Chum Grazie Mona TIME well spent is TIME well lived

shirley harrison

16 years 2 months ago

wonderful

Wow Mona This is Fantastic, an excellent way to show the world whats wrong! love..... shirley harrison

magics02

16 years 2 months ago

Thank you honey

I appreciate your take on my read Shirley and yes this big mess up will be bad oil spilling. I will be back for sure. ciao bella TIME well spent is TIME well lived

hobo

16 years 2 months ago

near and dear to my heart

boy I could go on and on about this, I am against off shore drilling or piplines or any of it. we could switch to hydrogen if we really wanted to but as long as there is money in grude we will never switch over. and it is a shame, beautifully written my friend

magics02

16 years 2 months ago

Thank you Hobo

Indeed indeed you are right on the money with that comment, Makes me so peeved off that this even had to happen and then to think the darn oil was spilling our for how many days now and why they could not stop it sooner. Whats up with that? Many questions not enough answers. ANd then the men that died due to it also. Something isn't right and we all know it. Will we ever find out what really happened out there you think? This is where my Villanelle poem came to mind. just what lies beneath oceans floor and then this had to happen. Makes us all wonder a little bit more and thank you so much for stopping by and your comment. I do appreciate it very much. Sorry for my rambling..this stuff touches me... Talk to you soon friend Mona TIME well spent is TIME well lived

magics02

16 years 2 months ago

Yes thank you Lovely

I am total agreement with your comment. I think of all this mess this accident has caused and for how much more it will. I loved this comment by the way!! Love Mona TIME well spent is TIME well lived

ngaioBeck

16 years 2 months ago

DECLINE

Timely and important write. Unfotunately the world is in the grip of rapacious Fascism,(as the current banking scandals should demonstrate). slowly and inexorably the hymnbook of world control is the "catch of the day".

magics02

16 years 2 months ago

Yes thank you

And as you probably know all the fish in the sea with the oil spill is creating havoc like crazy.. sad thing of the ocean's decline.....thank you for the visit by the way. Mona TIME well spent is TIME well lived

pleiades

16 years 2 months ago

this is excellent

this is excellent writing... and i'm not a fan of form poetry! you've managed to convey real emotion and feeling within a structured frame... not as easy to do as one may think as for the subject... current, relevent, and more than worth writing about the more i read this, the more impressed i am by it...i think this is worthy of publication have you thought of submitting it to environmental publications? or even local papers? i'm impressed (spotlight nomination) cheers p

magics02

16 years 2 months ago

Thank you Pleiades

Thank you for the support of this poem I did. I so appreciate your comments on it and yes I felt it the whole way I was writing it. I am trying to find out where to publish it here in the community as Indi said the same thing. I read of this everyday and stay tuned to the story as the oil is STILL coming out not even the monetary amount that they will have to pay and the lives that were lost for what?? Makes me madder than all get up and when it hits our shorelin it will be tragic too. ALot of tourists are backing out of coming here and there goes all our prisitne beaches and sealife dying. I still think there is something else behind this story that we are not being told. So glad you liked it and you inspired me once again to see about having it published. Any suggestions? Love back at ya gal Mona xoxoxo TIME well spent is TIME well lived

pleiades

16 years 2 months ago

as we’re from differnt

as we're from differnt sides of the world, i really have not much of an idea as to how you would seek out local publications. i can only suggest searching global organizations that are readily recognised, eg; world wide warriors, greenpeace, wilderness society, etc best of luck

magics02

16 years 2 months ago

Thank you for all your help here

So glad you dropped by to see me and hope your doing great friend Love, Mona TIME well spent is TIME well lived

magics02

16 years 1 month ago

I wonder where and if

This villanelle fell in line as the contest went. That would be nice for all of us to know who participated and where their poems went in line after the winner. I for one would like to see what poems were rated and how they were rated and where it stood as far as quality and write. It would be nice to know this for all of use not just for myself. is there any acessibility in finding this out. The Ocean is surely in a decline now with this disaster getting ever so closer to our shores. Mona

Arrow

16 years ago

This has a folksy, Judy Collins feel

and with that in mind, I have a few suggestions about word choice. *Of the fisherman's line - Maybe "End of the fisherman's line"? like "end of the line" *some words strike me as too "big" or "technical" or "highbrow", etc. for a folky song, i.e., -ELIMINATION from oil's tear: maybe use plain old "death", no need for euphemisms -gallons of oil drift UPON the shore: maybe just "to" or "on" or "up" -The AQUATIC life: maybe "fishermen's" or "watermen's" or something that gives a strong image of people working, communities affected You've got a strong refrain: active, rhyming, good images. Now, all you need is a guitar!

magics02

16 years ago

LOL no it is not a song

Thank you for your suggests but I wrote this more my feelings towards all of the sealife and the seabirds and this was done when the oil just began to spill out look at it today and it is a mass mess/ Thank you for your comments. I wil check them out okay. Mona:)

Candlewitch

16 years ago

Dear Mona

Excellent imagery in your lines of despair. It is truly lamentable, and I weep. I've sent my contribution towards rescue and cleaning up of the sea life. I hope others will do the same. Always, Cat

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