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M
mantiscepter
Apr 28, 2010 ⭐ View statistics (Premium feature)

Slate Of Life

 In a whirlpool of love
myself I am caught
chained by feelings helpless
pulled down I am not

alone to temptation
to leave stop these days
that have held me imprisoned
in love's heartless ways

giving from self
I think only good
my feelings unsheltered 
I think maybe I should

tried are the moments
each waking day brings
I fight with emotions
while other hearts sing

this slate of mine
must be erased
changed to goodness
before I am chased

to endeavors meaningless  
this life to me gone
lost to whirlpools of loving
where I do not belong.

— mantiscepter, Apr 28, 2010

About This Poem

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Country/Region: USA

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Critiques

L

lyz

16 years 1 month ago

Sad and deep Dear John

Not you, whats going on. Your poem is written with a blue cloud, well written, but content, got me worried. Hope all is well your end and I am going to reread. Love to you dear one. XX Back again, okay, slightly cryptic but, love has changed you of your old ways? This is what I am getting, maybe wrong. The wording is great and it is now something for me to ponder on. I will be back. Take care hun. XX
M

mantiscepter

16 years 1 month ago

MNo Clouds

Hi Liz. no I'm just fine, sometimes, you just need to write something different..... But thanks for asking I see seren had similar concerns, and I am happy as a clam I am, as you say here in the states a happy camper. even though I don't do any camping, unless it's at the holiday inn... emotion's are strange, and as actors we as writers need to act out our words on paper, and if we get some-one to truly believe us we have done our job... so Love to you all Bless Jade, you and the rest of your Family.. Your friend. John.
Seren

Seren

16 years 1 month ago

Wow John ~! …. there is a

Wow John ~! .... there is a difference to this one and I am totally serious you have moved out of your comfort zone and into the unknown imho ... beautifully sad and meloncholy ... hope its just another write and not a reflection of self love and big hugs JayCee x x x ("Quote:- Death is the great adventure beside which moon landings and space trips pale into insignificance. Addison Joseph")
M

mantiscepter

16 years 1 month ago

Mno Clouds

We all live and die, and have are memories to keep us warm. Blimey mate all is as should be. Just changed a direction or two. I wrote a couple off the wall poems that I Liked and I see no one else did, but thats true of all my writings, the ones I hold near and dear to my heart are very much Un-liked, for whom-ever can't interpret them, { not my job....] I write they read, if they have to get a dictionary out to follow oh well...Wow I'm glad thats over.. I am perfect, feel wonderful. and I did stay at a holiday inn. a commercial on the T.V- A Joke.. thanx for the read hope it was liked. I will write another off the wall poem this morning. so sleep well my angel and we will talk soon. thanks again for the read. Love John
L

lyz

16 years 1 month ago

Hi ya mate.

Well dear one, phew, that is a relief. Okay, I get we do sometimes need to throw one out there and I am so happy to know all is fine. I have reread, and I think all is worded well, flow etc also, and forgive earlier comment, just different than I am used to with your poetry. Well done on this piece and I am looking forward to many more from you. Love to you and yours. Lyz. XX