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THE MAN IN THE CAN

The man in the can is a selfish man, 

 isolated and incarcerated, 

 held captive by his own hand, 

 refused to learn from the past, 

 ignorant to bury the memory’s that last, 

 witch haunt’s and taunt‘s, 

 killing himself slowly, in a manner that holds fast

, he can’t worry about the future, or obsess about the past, 

 and must climb on a day by day path. 

 faster than the last, who thought  drink slower from the glass, and these things will pass. 

The man in the can at one time was a friend 

 before self-destruct mechanisms started to begin 

 born this way, like a machine to escape 

 emotional treason that helped make him this way 

 he sometimes wear’s a cape 


 with the letter H 

 this stands for help me before it’s to late 

 these dramatic scene’s that play out from time to time 

 are cries for help in his subconscious mind 

 those who know him think he’s blind  
 
like he’s in denial of the fact that he’s running out of time 

 as the past sometimes repeat it’s self through hereditary lines 

 not seeing the light until he’s already blind

 born in a prison 

wanting to be free

complaining like a spoiled brat habitually

when the whole time i held the key 

to my own sobriety. 

 





 















 
































 

 





 




 









 

— jon stone, Apr 23, 2010

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Critiques

Candlewitch

Candlewitch

16 years 1 month ago

hello

Excellent self-observances. May I suggest that you change all the "&'s" to "and" as I think it is more appealing to the eye. Also one minor thing, I think you want manner instead of manor. your poem/prose was interesting to read. Always, Cat
T

thewaitingroom

16 years 1 month ago

WELL DONE AND PERFECT MY FRIEND!

This was a great piece man.I gotta hand it to you,i was feelin it all the way through.But im sure it comes as no surprise that a scotsman would get this.lol Its a tough road and a miserable thing to discover on your own. when the people that warned ya are no longer there to care.So to you i raise my pint! jk..great job on this man! i really dug it.......................
M

magics02

16 years 1 month ago

Yes it is great

Suggest only here Can you break in down to verses so it may be easier to read in a format. As cat suggests are great too. Afterall it is your write to do with as you please, just feedback here after I read it. I see the rhyme and know that in the correct format it would read and flow better possibly. One only knows, experiment in your word program or open office and try it out. You may correct me if I am wrong here. I also read of the darkness you endured and know that I am happy to see you have turned your life around and are flying high on life itself without the man in the can. I will return to your page as I like what your self realization has lightened your way now. Kudos to you. Magics02 TIME well spent is TIME well lived
xena465

xena465

16 years 1 month ago

Dear Jon

I love your passion...Brill Rosina xena465
NS

Nicole Stone

16 years 1 month ago

Hey babe, like the new

Hey babe, like the new revision...can you wear that cape with the letter H for me sometime ;) he he I LUV YA!!!
JS

jon stone

16 years ago

I like it.

name it and claim it.