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Crumbling Love

Statue erected
starting to crumble over me
now gone forever
— Benjamin1987, Apr 20, 2010

About This Poem

About the Author

Region, Country: Boston, Massachusetts, USA

Favorite Poets: The Beat Generation

More from this author

Critiques

DawningDaytripper

DawningDaytripper

16 years 1 month ago

Intesting, direct. Long

Interesting, direct. Long title for the content Benjamin, and well if you dropped a couple of sylable's from your first and thrid line, it would be a Haiku. And I would call it Crumbles of love, Statue erected starting to crumble over me now gone forever Now it is a Haiku! Whats ya think? Julie D.D.
Benjamin1987

Benjamin1987

16 years 1 month ago

Thank You Very Much

I have been experimenting with Haiku for a couple weeks and have not been sure how I am doing. Thank you for the insight and for fixing my syllabication.
DawningDaytripper

DawningDaytripper

16 years 1 month ago

Glad to be of assistanc, for

Glad to be of assistanc, for future referance. 5 7 5 Most traditional Haikus are of nature, other than that. Just have fun. look forward to future posts. Julie D.D.