Seren

Apr 15, 2010 ⭐ View statistics (Premium feature)

the Devil has a crown

when perspective was lost
so was the sight of a seer

when the light turned to dark
it was the growing of fear

and as midnight chimed
over the seal of rights

cloaks where adorned
in a spirit of no light

the earth was stirred
and awoken from sleep

and the elements cried
shaking from the deep

as the rite was performed
and blood trickled down

a virgin was slaughtered
by the will of a crown

— Seren, Apr 15, 2010

About This Poem

About the Author

Region, Country: Beyond the Black Stump..Australia, AUS

Favorite Poets: Pablo Neruda, P.K.Page, W.H.Auden, to many and various to include them all ...

Critiques

beautiful nightmare

16 years 1 month ago

niccce

may i ask what inspired you to write this poem?

Seren

16 years 1 month ago

the slaughter of innocence ... all through time thanks for the read glad you liked it love and hugs Jayne-Chloe (http://www.neopoet.com/forum/36627-meet-n-greet-live-chat-thurs-apr-15th-9-11-pm-ny-est-host-poewriter58-welcome-new-member#comment-175177) ... Be there ~!~!~!

Candlewitch

16 years 1 month ago

Dear Jayne

Ah, dear lady, this is part of what has me feeling so empty. You describe it excellently. Love, Cat

Seren

16 years 1 month ago

yup so much death and

yup so much death and destruction its hard to to get down sometimes thanks very much for the read and the comment You have been in my thoughts and prayers love and hugs Jayne-Chloe x x x (http://www.neopoet.com/forum/36627-meet-n-greet-live-chat-thurs-apr-15th-9-11-pm-ny-est-host-poewriter58-welcome-new-member#comment-175177) ... Be there ~!~!~!

lyz

16 years 1 month ago

Dear Jayne

Quite profound and urgent. I enjoy the imagery in your poem, read it twice and I like the racy flow. Title is apt and as is content. It is well written. Tragic maybe, but still, grand read. XX

Seren

16 years 1 month ago

Dear Lyz

Thanks for the comment hun having a few yuck days and its showing in my writing lol will see you next week you and Jade need me to do anything just let me know ... Bethany is coming with as well love and big hugs Jayne-Chloe (http://www.neopoet.com/forum/36627-meet-n-greet-live-chat-thurs-apr-15th-9-11-pm-ny-est-host-poewriter58-welcome-new-member#comment-175177) ... Be there ~!~!~!

partacidcharm

16 years 1 month ago

fantastic

I always look forward to reading your writes! you have an incredible talent to tell a story with few words, my dear. m

Seren

16 years 1 month ago

Dear M

Thanks for the comment this ones an old one I pulled out and tarted up ... I still have about 15 journals I havent touched lol will probably see a few more of thiese ones over time love and hugs Jayne-Chloe x x (http://www.neopoet.com/forum/36627-meet-n-greet-live-chat-thurs-apr-15th-9-11-pm-ny-est-host-poewriter58-welcome-new-member#comment-175177) ... Be there ~!~!~!

xena465

16 years 1 month ago

I agree

There is too much death and destruction and you portay it so well in your super poem JayCee...Great Stuff ***** Rosina xena465

Seren

16 years 1 month ago

Dear Rosina

Unfortunately you turn the news on and all it is is tragedy ... something new everyday ... thanks for the read and the comment this one was an old one I thought to fix up and post love and hugs Jayne-Chloe x x (http://www.neopoet.com/forum/36627-meet-n-greet-live-chat-thurs-apr-15th-9-11-pm-ny-est-host-poewriter58-welcome-new-member#comment-175177) ... Be there ~!~!~!

seabhac

16 years 1 month ago

Hi Jayne

There is a nice symbiosis here of your younger rhyming form and your recent delving into the minimal with word and it works very well. One thing as I read it firstly and again when I took the time to think about why are the lines cloaks where adorned in a spirit of no light spirit of no light seems contrived and is not fluid enough not to stop me in my tracks. My suggestion would be cloaks where adorned For the absence of light It may change your original intent in the writing of this so is just a suggestion. Seabhac

Seren

16 years 1 month ago

Deae Liz

I totally agree that line needs some work I ahve been thinking of a few ways to fix it ... will take you suggestion and see what I come up with when I do an edit thanks for the read and the comment love and hugs JayCee Quote:- It is a thousand times better to have common sense without education than to have education without common sense.---Robert Green Ingersoll

Seren

16 years 1 month ago

Not meant to be

Not meant to be inspirational Annie its about a certain 'thing' ... and that line got your attention because of what you think it means(if your thinking in a religious way)I maybe wrong , it actually means something totally different to me ... but I am going to let you take whatever impression that line gave you ... for each reader there is a different meaning ... thats poetry Jayne-Chloe (Quote:- It is a thousand times better to have common sense without education than to have education without common sense.---Robert Green Ingersoll)

Dalton

16 years 1 month ago

dear Seren

well don, your best so far. john

Seren

16 years 1 month ago

Dear Dalton

Thanks so much for your wonderful comment and I apologise for being late answering I have been unwell this week ... will be round seeing what you have been up to tonight or tomorrow ... thanks again for the visit take care love JayCee Quote:- It is a thousand times better to have common sense without education than to have education without common sense.---Robert Green Ingersoll

greeneyes

15 years 11 months ago

WOW, I was taking a look at

WOW, I was taking a look at some of your old stuff, and came across this. don't know how I missed this one, but I'm sorry I did. Great poem. Elizabeth

Seren

15 years 11 months ago

Elizabeth … I often go

Elizabeth ... I often go through the old poems of friends I dont always comment but even though I think I have nearly read every one of your poems doesnt mean I dont go back for a reread .. some of my best inspiration has come from such late night reads thanks again love and hugs JayCee x x (Quote~~"It is by universal misunderstanding that all agree. For if, by ill luck, people understood each other, they would never agree. "--Charles Baudelaire)