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The Ocean

The station bench was yours

that day, a man approached 

with backward stare, sat down

beside, began to talk of what

you couldn't hear, his eyes wet;

''I have a gun in my mouth'', 

they said, he spoke, you listened,

nothing, and walked away

whispering; ''I don't care''


''When shadow is a bastard 

sun, breathes dirt among the 

nesting worms on branches 

underground, what sun counts 

passerby's too slow for flickering 

strings of trains, greying eyes,

or strobes in misty nightclubs?''

 

Dark is treading water now, and

all around you careful feet lift, dip 

past snakes and thorns,- and out 

into the ocean.


— doorman, Mar 30, 2010

About This Poem

About the Author

Country/Region: NOR

More from this author

Critiques

L

lyz

16 years 2 months ago

Dear Espen

Deep, maybe as the ocean, gave me a shiver. Very well written. Lyz. XX
Kailashana

Kailashana

16 years 2 months ago

Thank you for writing this.

Thank you for writing this. It's good to read poetry of this oceanic eye. ~A "Your task is not to seek for love, but merely to seek and find all the barriers within yourself that you have built against it." ~ A Course In Miracles
Seren

Seren

16 years 2 months ago

Dear Espen

I thought the whole poem was wonderful but the last few lines from his eyes wet in the first stanza and the second stanza say so much ... wonderfully deep poetry and those speaking wet eyes say so much love JayCee x
J

J.Thomas

16 years 2 months ago

I get severe images when

I get severe images when reading your work, always. All of my senses were used. although, my eyes were the only thing physically involved. You've got some special talent.
P

panaella

16 years 2 months ago

amazing depth...

Hello, The extended metaphores...eyes...especially (sigh)...I'm jealous of you alrady! Will check out your work, most definitely! Ells x
doorman

doorman

16 years 2 months ago

Thank you all!

Thank you all for taking your time to read. Your compliments humble, and strengthen. Respectfully yours, Espen.
ID

Ink Dragon

16 years 2 months ago

When shadow is a bastard/sun...

Espen, I am jealous! What an image! The only thing that tripped me up a little was "passerby's"... feels like it is not quite correct here... but that should be an easy thing to rectify. Yours, ~Nina
L

lyz

16 years 2 months ago

Yes

What an image. One of your best I would say. Love Lyz. XX