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Positive forces

A force that wraps you in warmth
Securing, leaves nothing to harm
Vague, masked, unseen.

You’re lost in darkness
Light he will provide
By your side, unmasked.

A scratch on your cheek
His fury unleashed
Intents kill with a glance.

Lost in your deepest thought
He provides clarity
Bringing fourth your final verdict.

At loss for positivity
He’ll make you smile
Take you in his arms.

Your desires unseen
He completes them
Show you his heart.

The wall you’ve built
He’s climbed over it
Lowered the bridge.

Feelings you’ve never felt
He gives you unsparingly
Never to leave you in the cold.

You made him promise
He’d keep this forever
To lose would be the end.

A positive force you’ve found
To have, and hold forever

— sunscreen, Mar 11, 2010

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Critiques

Alice Ember

Alice Ember

16 years 3 months ago

Nice

I liked it. There was alot of feelings in there. It kept me interested the whole time. I don't know what really else to say. But,great job keep it up :p Love, Alice Odi et Amo ( I love and I hate)
M

magics02

16 years 3 months ago

WOW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Your just blossoming like I dont know what here sunblocker. Truly unbelievable the best of yours yet, I just love it so. Great job now just go fix that one misspelled word and that is lose in line or is it to be loose? Other then that an amazing write of yours. Proud of you big time.. Love magics02
M

magics02

16 years 3 months ago

one more time

This is the stanza I was talking about You made him promise He’d keep this forever To loose would be the end. ( meaning too loose like juice) Learn to live, learn to forgive. Life is too short.
xena465

xena465

16 years 2 months ago

A lovely poem from the heart

A lovely poem from the heart Alex. How's yer wee pussy cat doing? Rosina xena465
sunscreen

sunscreen

16 years 2 months ago

Thank you

It just came out all the sudden, Ninjas doing fine Mum. I presented her with a rat the other day, and she ran the other way....I'm afraid ninja may be scared of rats, but fearless with dogs. Although she gets a long fine with my bearded dragon, phoenix, hes a snake eater though, he ate a ball python awhile back.
Seren

Seren

16 years 2 months ago

Dear Alex

good to see you growing in word wonderfully :) love JayCee
Seren

Seren

16 years 2 months ago

Alex congrates on evolution

Alex congrates on evolution hun ~! the spoon poem will go on the day after next I am just sumitting a series at the moment tonights the last one of three :) then I shall reveal my spooon :) love and hugs and a giggle JayCee x x
P

pamela

16 years 2 months ago

Dear S., This a

Dear S., This a beautiful write. I liked the first and last verses the best, but the whole poem was just great. Keep up the good work. P.
sunscreen

sunscreen

16 years 2 months ago

Thank you very much :) I’m

Thank you very much :) I'm glad you like this poem, as everyone no matter what has had at least one positive force in their life.
Bonitaj

Bonitaj

16 years 2 months ago

WELL DONE KIDDO!

I didn't recognise your new name at first, so I had no pre-conceived ideas of who wrote this! You've come a long way! Excellent work - keep it up! Boni