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a wild thing of creation,caged

The fig tree
was our rotunda,
the roots valleys
leading to our kingdom

not fifty feet away
a concrete range
bridged worlds,
and stood silently, sullen
our very own
mountain of doom

fearsome as knights and maids
we traversed cement battlements
I crossed on the Styx,
the other world moved
like a slithering mass of parasites
ever closing in on our seat of power

shimmers of time shivered the river,
as the monster of madness
split the surface

an almighty bellow,
'get the fuck home
for dinner'

my brother,

a Caesar ruled
and was slaughtered
by his own,
me caged and fed
like a wild thing
by mine

— Seren, Mar 08, 2010

About This Poem

About the Author

Region, Country: Beyond the Black Stump..Australia, AUS

Favorite Poets: Pablo Neruda, P.K.Page, W.H.Auden, to many and various to include them all ...

More from this author

Critiques

Kailashana

Kailashana

16 years 3 months ago

Jesus H. Christ, Jayne.

Jesus H. Christ, Jayne. Leave me the fuck alone already, I can't take any more. Dinner is served, my head on the platter! hahahaha. Love, Mummy "A poem is never finished, only abandoned." ~ Paul Valery
Seren

Seren

16 years 3 months ago

Lmao this was a funny write

Lmao this was a funny write i was remembering and then pop he chimed in lol so I left the buggar there lol some nostalgia love and big hugs Jayne-Chloe x x x
C

CyberSpace

16 years 3 months ago

wild thing is putting it

wild thing is putting it mildy wouldnt you say lol love hubby xoxoxoxox
Kailashana

Kailashana

16 years 3 months ago

Wild thing, I think I love

Wild thing, I think I love you....http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4qHX493bB3U "A poem is never finished, only abandoned." ~ Paul Valery
Seren

Seren

16 years 3 months ago

Wild thing ….do do do do

Wild thing ....do do do do .... you make my heart sinnnnngg you makeeee everything ...... ;) I love that song so much my dad played it for me at my 21st I was always his wild child lol love and hugs Jayne-Chloe x x x
P

pamela

16 years 3 months ago

Dear Seren, I love

Dear Seren, I love the discriptive tone of this work. Great job! P.
Seren

Seren

16 years 3 months ago

Dear Judd

lol glad I could trip you down memory lane ... thanks for the lovely comment love and big hugs Jayne-Chloe
WW

Will Wright

16 years 3 months ago

childhood, remembered

Very playful - a fond memory. The alliteration was very jolly. I liked the spacing, but would review the punctuation. The almighty bellow part stops the narrative cold, like ice water thrown in the face - a shock, given the warmth that came before it. But appropriate, as a hostile brother interrupting dreamy playtime would. The last stanza is a quick turn, reflective, not exactly angry and not exactly frustrated, but detached, an observation. This is an enjoyable, evocative read.
Seren

Seren

16 years 3 months ago

You read it perfectly Will

You read it perfectly Will ... exactly my intent with all your points especially the bellowing part lol ... was meant to stop you cold in your tracks ... havent done a full edit so will work on the punctuation in the edits ... its never been my strong point lol and something I always endeavor to improve ... thanks for the review and the comment love and hugs Jayne-Chloe x x x