sunscreen

Mar 04, 2010 ⭐ View statistics (Premium feature)

Ember

Dragons flame touch down
Over a field full of dreams
Disintegrating the ocean

Her face awes stars
Her body turns faces
Her feet full of hopes

The fire turns field into hearts
The ocean mist forms unity
Waves of conformity

Loves true touch
Peace that we all hold
Uniting the different clicks

Turning the world around
Words that complete us
Sensations that consume us

Ember blow your fire
Make us whole again
Renew our love.

— sunscreen, Mar 04, 2010

About This Poem

About the Author

Critiques

xena465

16 years 3 months ago

Lovely…wish that

Lovely...wish that dragon's flame would aim it's fire to cupid, and bring such devoted love to me. Rosina xena465

sunscreen

16 years 3 months ago

Yeah me too :)

magics02

16 years 3 months ago

Love it much!!

Bravo to you the one who ...You are really getting good at this from whence you first came aboard here. I am just loving this one, Bravo to you dear friend. Love, magics02 Learn to live, learn to forgive. Life is too short.

sunscreen

16 years 3 months ago

Thank you :)

Haha I was a mess of a poet when i first started, but now I'm full fledged and kicking, with loot of help from Nina of course lol. I'm glad you like this poem, though the inspiration for it was a bad one, the poem turned out beautiful.

magics02

16 years 3 months ago

Yes the Ink Dragon knows well and does well

YOu got the best teacher on here in my humble honest opinion as she is the great Ink Dragon aboard. Kudos to you again for your progress my friend. Spring soon will be here!! love magics02 Learn to live, learn to forgive. Life is too short.

sunscreen

16 years 3 months ago

Haha I know I do I certainly

Haha I know I do I certainly am the lucky duckling, Thanks a lot but I would not have progressed without the loving support of you, and other fellow neopoets.

Kailashana

16 years 3 months ago

The fledgling is soon to

The fledgling is soon to fly. Niiiice work. ~A "If parents really would love their children there would no longer be any war." J. Krishnamurti

sunscreen

16 years 3 months ago

Nooooo

Not quite ready to fly I'm barely learning how to walk

Venus x

16 years 3 months ago

I Like This A lot Too

Venus I Like This A lot Too **Smiles** Very passionate and sensual read, again it carried a nice flow, bringing the reader along with you. The only line that doesn't work for me, and maybe I'm just not getting it,and it wouldn't be the first time..lol "Her feet full of hopes" ? perhaps Her heart full of hopes or hopes and dreams? It might make the flow a bit better? but omho Lovely pen. Venus xxx

sunscreen

16 years 3 months ago

I actually had it like that at first

But I decided as she is flying over, and people are looking up at her, their hopes are at her feet.

Venus x

16 years 3 months ago

That makes sense to me

Venus That makes sense to me....lol As usual, I just didn't get it, but this does make sense after you explained. **Smiles** Venus xxx

sunscreen

16 years 3 months ago

It doesn’t much matter if

It doesn't much matter if you completely understand the write, but if you can relate, and enjoy it, then you've got enough out of it.

sunscreen

16 years 3 months ago

Why thank you troy :) I

Why thank you troy :) I appreciate the lesson on the Greek goddess :) Though it was merely by accident.

Bonitaj

16 years 3 months ago

love it!

can't go into too much discussion right now - but it was definately a step up from your other work! You've taken off - Go fly now! bonita j

sunscreen

16 years 3 months ago

Thank you very much :) Its

Thank you very much :) Its the only poem so far, that I don't think I'll ever have to edit :)

Seren

16 years 3 months ago

The one

Loved this one and you do have one of the best teachers here I was blessed to have had her guidance as well ;) .. wonderful poem now walk on poet :) Kind regards love Jayne-Chloe x x x

sunscreen

16 years 3 months ago