Neopoet

Join the Neopoet online poetry workshop and community to improve as a writer, meet fellow poets, and showcase your work. Sign up, submit your poetry, and get started.

sunscreen
sunscreen
Feb 23, 2010 ⭐ See this poem's read count — a supporter feature

Sunscreen

Protect you from harm
Save you from damage
Keep you sheltered

Falling rays of danger
Burning away security
Bad influences taking over

Apply for my aide
Guidance I give
Love I provide

A new layer of skin
hardened to keep away sin
Take away your pain discarding it in the bin.

Protection I provide keeps out pain
Apply me unsparingly to yourself
Take use of Me in times of need
I will forever be your sunscreen

— sunscreen, Feb 23, 2010
More from this author

Critiques

C

Clem

16 years 5 months ago

Good Job

I am a candidate for friendship after reading this poem although you may have meant it for someone a lot more special. This poem’s strength is unity. You chose a theme – sunscreen – and carried it through to the end. Good job. Ideas for improvement: You use the poetic convention of rhyme only in the 4th stanza. Perhaps you could have used it in each stanza, like for the first and third line. Keep up the good work.
sunscreen

sunscreen

16 years 5 months ago

Thank you :)

Haha The poem is meant for the world, I didn't have a specific person in mind for it :)
xena465

xena465

16 years 5 months ago

I like that it’s for the

I like that it's for the world...It's good to help others. Rosina xena465

Join Neopoet to leave a critique

Neopoet is a free community of poets who critique and support each other's writing.

Join free Log in