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she walks alone today

remember the sun-rise?  ever?
she presses her face in her hands
blowing smoke frome her refry stinks
up the city, stealing sobs and bitcheries.
but they still don't make any mace for rats
and for that
she doesn't weep
but she cries,
                           cries,
                                       cries.

in that sunshine, then.
she holds steady to any yesters'
so many "i told you so's" driven home
make you pull like a mule, like a mule, like a mule
but they still don't make white-out for old chats
and for that
she won't care
but she cries,
                          cries,
                                      cries.

now stick it to the sunset!
she's seen sixth street and bourbon street
ever so stupid, horny, drunk and sad
and every shade of maybeline
sometimes big papa has to trim the fat
and for that
kiss her ass
but she cries,
                          cries,
                                      cries.

                           down Riverside

she doesnt want to see
the moon alone anymore.
she won't cry
outside

— the_fool, Feb 21, 2010

About This Poem

About the Author

Region, Country: Austin, TX, USA

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Critiques

Kailashana

Kailashana

16 years 3 months ago

Damn, man I love your

Damn, man I love your poetry... the gates are rusty in Palisades Park and the moon is m e l t i n g in the dark her mascara is running, don't shoot the breeze with the tears of a red-nosed clown drunk beside your bedside table. ~A
R

raskin

16 years 3 months ago

The repetition is good here

The repetition is good here and adds a lot to the poem. It's tough to see a person caught in that round a bout of pain and sadness and lacks the will or ability to get out. This was written in an interesting manner. raskin
the_fool

the_fool

16 years 3 months ago

you realy picked up on

you realy picked up on trying to make it look like a building, i tried to give the feel you were going downstairs, deeper and deeper to the cheaper apartments. and Riverside is the street here in austin she lives on, very popular here. this is an earlier one of mine that i kinda structured to be a song, but i'm no musician. this one needs a lot of work, thx for the help.
the_fool

the_fool

16 years 3 months ago

edited

changed the ending, the old one only sounded cool if you planned to sing it, so this repalces the repititious-'doesn't want to see the moon' o, and that disconnected riverside part, all the other stanzas start with a reference to the time of day with th sun, she walks alone every night, so riverside is a transition to the moon, but it comes quicker than the sun. oi, that sounded confusing. t_f