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O
Orphani
Feb 20, 2010 ⭐ View statistics (Premium feature)

a drop of honey

My hands learned a song
your eyes wrote the music
I dreamed in a weeping sky
I would awaken in your arms

My hands learned to let go
my eyes have lost such light
skipping a kicked beat my feet
fell in to a thousand nowheres

can shadows fall between  more gently
in a first kiss of moon on water?
can my ear be more than you whisper?
in the tongues twined question

when you are not
and I some form have yet to take
waiting lips have yet to taste
all the world in a drop of honey
— Orphani, Feb 20, 2010

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Critiques

whitetea

whitetea

16 years 3 months ago

i can tell that this was

i can tell that this was written with a lot of care. what stage do you feel this is at, did it come around the way you wanted it to. well done... Each sense using its own craft.
O

Orphani

16 years 3 months ago

No this did not achieve my

No this did not achieve my desired goal of expression. I am always reaching for an understanding that is almost self excluding one that transcends self to appropriate the essence of the desired subject. B
O

Orphani

16 years 3 months ago

Somday maybe we will have

Somday maybe we will have the great Neo party where we will all celabrate this gift of joy and life and we will dance and eat and drink and read poetry till we are all consumed and what is left is swept up the next day dried rolled and smoked by those friends of Bob Marley http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UPeIGxPrD3A B
J

J.Thomas

16 years 3 months ago

I love this concept. “all

I love this concept. "all th world in one drop of honey." it's so sweet and delicate.
Nordic cloud

Nordic cloud

16 years 3 months ago

Dear Barry and Anna-the "we"

"skipping a kicked beat my feet fell in to a thousand nowhere" Here the space between you is described, that intangible space, the one where a drop of honey would be blown by the vagaries of the wind, chased by the insects in its flight, coloured by the reflections of the rainbows, shaped by the pull of gravity to fall into the mouth of your love and leave its string of thin sweetness hanging as a rope to hold you together forever. Such sweet solace.... Ann with love in her eyes.
O

Orphani

16 years 3 months ago

A lot of flowers distill

A lot of flowers distill into each drop of honey and one drop is more then any life deserves; unless we can teach the flowers to grow. I can but plant water and watch as such sweetness is born.Love sister Anne B
Kailashana

Kailashana

16 years 3 months ago

The I that is We is a

The I that is We is a perfect circle. We find each other in small breaks of the heart. The song of we is an echo of you, of me, returning with the answer: YES! Always returning with the scent of love, the taste of honey on our lips of memory. Thank you Barry, my darling, I adore you. ~A
O

Orphani

16 years 3 months ago

There is a universe within

There is a universe within that one drop within that one moment it is more then all the value of all my days with out love.With out you. B
seabhac

seabhac

16 years 3 months ago

Just one drop of honey

Is enough to have the knowledge of sweetness and the echo of its memory can bring taste to the dryest lips. Seabhac
O

Orphani

16 years 3 months ago

Inside there are many

Inside there are many carnages many battles faught many flags planted and uprooted Many oceans crossed to find a single hope of a new beginning a new dream to die for.To live for. B
Bonitaj

Bonitaj

16 years 3 months ago

what I really liked

about this piece is that we didn't find ourselves "stuck" in the mire of sweetness and yet there was an abundance of it! ;) |Boni
O

Orphani

16 years 3 months ago

Such mire is the plight of

Such mire is the plight of man to let his brother die without compassion. Such sweetness is to cry to loud with idle hands unwilling to toil for loves cause. B
Geezer

Geezer

16 years 3 months ago

Absolutely!

I really have to get around to commenting earlier, that way I can say something that no-one else has said. Dripping honey, without being something over-sweet! ~ Gee
Nordic cloud

Nordic cloud

16 years 3 months ago

Ann of Norway“and write

Ann of Norway "and write with joy. Barry …o.. Its not through writing the greatest poem that we find glory, but by living it" Saw this on a comment of yours and ....? Hi from me Barry O Ann.