No Greater Love

Love is a difficult emotion to describe. Not just simply a wonderful, exuberant concoction of chemicals and hormones in the pit of your stomach, it takes many forms: an action, gesture or simply an evanescent, elevated feeling of intense happiness when a moment just feels right. But even more complex is the form of love that comes in sacrifice. For more often the greatest, rarest and most sacred forms of love is so much more than a simple chemical reaction. Rather, it is the unceasing, unvarying and neverending, continual decision to deny oneself and dedicate your life to another no matter what the cost. In a world where we must so often step on others to get ahead in life and where, although we are taught to "love our neighbours as we love ourselves", there is always that hidden agenda written in fine print that states that if you would ever dare to wish to achieve any kind of worldly success, benevolence and altruism won't get you very far. After all "America's next top model" wasn't called "America's next top best friend." Because of this true sacrificial love seems like nothing more than a glittery, fabled myth. However, over the December holidays whilst doing some extra work experience at Victoria Hospital, a small little ex-millitary hospital in Cape Town, I had the priveledge of witnessing a moment in time that has deeply imprinted into my heart; the message that prehaps unconditional love does still exist. It had been a long day and my feet ached. I wasn't used to spending so many gruelling hours on my feet or being in an environment so outside my comfort zone. Although Dr. Cupido (the doctor I was shadowing) was very friendly and made every effort to make me feel comfortable, I still wan't quite sure where the boundary lay between stalking him and staying close enough to be within reach - just in case he wanted to show me something. Not wanting to make a nuisance of myself and get in his way I would often independently venture off a little distance away and chat to some of the patients. At first, Mrs. James seemed like just another typical patient as she lay sleeping with the regular beep of the heart machine next to her and an IV drip stuck into her arm. I was about to move on when Dr. Cupido joined me and shared some of her history with me. Mrs. James suffered from some type of hereditary disease that had paralysed her and caused mental retardation. Once a healthy, vibrant mother of two beautiful little girls, a wife and a teacher, she could now barely talk, walk or even feed herself. Worst of all, she wasn't expected to live past her forty-fifth birthday. Her husband, Mr. James, sat next to her tenderly stroking her forehead. Mr. James had once been a prominent businessman in Kalk Bay, owning two very successful businesses with promising futures. But when his wife took ill and could no longer look after herself, he immediately sold both businesses and stayed at home to look after her so that she wouldn't have to be sent to an institution. Twenty years of his life he had sacrificed and dedicated to looking after her. Yet even now, amidst all their hardship and struggle, he still loved her as much as he had on their wedding day; if not more. Dr. Cupido decided to discharge Mrs. James as there was nothing more he could do for her. I watched as Mr. James gently shook his wife awake. Exhausted and disoriented, she struggled to stay awake. He patiently and softly motivated her to focus. "It's time to go home," he said with a big, tired smile. She looked back at him with a big, toothless grin, saliva dripping from the corners of her mouth; her face incandescent and her eyes now bright with excitment. "Come," she said simply. He looked back at her with pride and saw in her the most beautiful woman he had ever seen. "Yes, let's go home." "No greater love is there that one should lay down his life for another" and yes, somehow miraculously in this cruel world filled with people who are so consumed with 'me, myself and I' and where no kind deed is done without an ulterior motive a love such as that still exists. Mr. James may not be what the world would consider successful, but to me he is a greater inspiration than any multi-millionaire business tycoon at the top of the career ladder. Because in the act of loving his wife unconditionally, he has proved that there is still something worth waiting for, worth fighting for, and worth living for.