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Vietnam

Red dragons' gaping jaws
pouring, surfing his breath
tiger silk butterflies
splitting open my sky wide,
hard velvet beating wings
that spit,sizzle,hiss
casting barbed silk welts
omitting his lightening
jagged bolts fierce orange
fluttering, flapping their frenzy of heat
against the colbat blue
of my calm,
whipping, stalking my eyes
afore taking flight 
forcing rapid blink to wince
at their painful beauty.
all breath caught,
stuck in the lungs that
beat in rhythm with the tiger wings

That red dragon
made of wood
paint peeling
roars and thunders
claws atapping on the varnished floor boards
thick hind legs sliding on the polished beams
scrabbling to catch
the snipers
snip snip snipping
the old hut
chunks make teeth of the roof and door
eye spy
pass the parcel
blow it piece by piece
catch a glimpse of me
running
room to room
trying to catch the dragons tiger
dodge the jungle hiders blades.

sharp tainted purple mists
penetrate the sepia skies
cameo bayonets hack that ladder
seams of skin unravel
stitched open in tremors of BZ
fortified in eyes that view no pretty illusions
frenzied whir of green and red meet
the dust
gentleing my fall to final softness

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L

Lonnie

16 years 3 months ago

Kind of a must read for me!

Being a Vietnam Vet, I was naturally drawn to the title! Very well-written poem filled with bright imagery and forceful language! Nice job!
L

Lunegirl

16 years 3 months ago

Hey lonnienot having

Hey lonnie not having experience i wanted to do this one sensitivly. I am glad you liked it, im am always in awe of people who have been in the war zone. my ex used to be in the army. If you have any suggestions for development id be happy to recieve them vix ; ) Optimism in adversity nutures positive outcomes
xena465

xena465

16 years 3 months ago

Great...

Such an imaginary piece of wonderful writing. Well done. Rosina xena465
L

Lunegirl

16 years 3 months ago

Thanks, i’ve just updated

Thanks, i've just updated it, do you think it needs tweaking? vix Optimism in adversity nutures positive outcomes
xena465

xena465

16 years 3 months ago

Not at all...

It's perfect vix. Rosina xena465
Seren

Seren

16 years 3 months ago

Dear Vix

On a first read this is a well written poem and a subject that needs the proper attention I will come back tomorrow night and see if I can offer any advice at the moment its near 3am I am going to try and sleep love and hugs Jayne x x x
L

Lunegirl

16 years 3 months ago

Thanks JC lol, i hope you

Thanks JC lol, i hope you get some shut eye lovely love vixy xxx Optimism in adversity nutures positive outcomes