Platinum Silver Blue Waves

"And touch my heart".......touchED in context with the rest? "All because they saw my tears"....what about fears here to avoid repetition? " Soft voice as whispers heard In wave after wave Electric blue mermaids Sing their siren songs"....this verse is slightly difficult in its flow for me? Some of this is a little inconsistent in style, and there are too many magical mermaids and such for me, I find it too loaded as if there was just too much, and it could be more powerful and enjoyable with a little less. I am not quite sure what I mean but that's how I feel with this one, Maggie. You are trying to include our favourite bits at the expense of the poetry. Love from Ann of Norway as aye Maggie

Dear Blue a lovely poem here, however it needs something more i fear. the verses need lengthening, you have the spirit of something lovely i just think it needs different perspective here and there. it is our duty as poets to paint pictures with our words. you can do this only i feel you are just touching upon something, as if holding something so fragile for fear it might break. perhaps i'm not making much sense. i hoipe you understand and don't think i'm being too cruel. love john xoxoxo

I really enjoyed this write with it's imagery of light and I needed to read something as inspiring and uplifting as this one. I hope things are settling down for you and I think this is the best I read of yours to date. Love ya friend Mona xoxo Learn to live, learn to forgive. Life is too short.

Ann of Norway "Weeping forbidden tears For me the colours washed away All because they saw my tears" ................couldn't it be fears, perhaps the first one? "Soft voice as whispers heard In wave after wave Electric blue mermaids Sing their siren songs" Soft voice as whispers heard In wave on wave electric blue Mermaids sing their siren songs Reminding me of you...................................? "They light the way of souls who have lost their way" They light the way for souls who've fallen by the way or..........who've gone and lost their way or.........When they have lost their way. I'll do no more and stand reprimanded if I have in any way trodden on your toes, not my intention, just thinking around this poem which shines with its azure blue platinum silvered glances of light and I would not disturb the waters it rests on, if it disturbs your 'soul' too, dear sweet Maggie! Love from Ann