Impressions (after looking at Van Gogh's "Sunflower")

If you take all the petals off one side it would look like the painter, lol, Sorry just had to say that, this is a good picture of a painting but is copying , so it would be better to find your own flower to paint but are we all afraid of the snapping jaws of the Snapdragon. Anyway a great poem there, Yours Ian.T

Hello Congratulations! Your poem has been nominated for the New Advocate's Spotlight award. The following detailed critique will be considered in the decision making process. I think you have handled the descriptive telling of van Gogh's "Sunflower" quite well. (One of many that he did if I might add) However, I would have liked to see a bit more "show" than "tell" in this piece. List poetry often tends to simply tell and can leave a reader a bit brittle, craving just a bit more emotion; needing more than a picture. We can look at his painting if we want the image. I want to see the image in words jump out before me and know the emotion felt when the poet first saw the painting and the impression it left on him/her. Had you not mentioned the painting in your title, I do not think the poem would have stood on its own. But, with a bit of rephrasing this piece can really shine. Vincent van Gogh was such a brilliant painter; it is a shame those of his day did not recognize the emotion held within his work. Thank you for the opportunity to read and leave my impressions on your poem. If you would like a more detailed critique or suggestions for improvement in this piece, please send me a PM and I will be happy to look at this with you. Good luck and again, Congratulations on your nomination. ~Pamela