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Blood diamond


Cut deep
that blade on ya finger
set in ring
meant to dazzle and linger

Oh my darling
till death do we part
i love you so much
with all of my heart

see how it sparkles, see
how it shines
gestated from the
finest Gauteng mines

fret now, not thou darling
smooth thy brow
please worry you not
how thou-st diamonds begot

for i love you, you see
says Debeer stone shine brilliant
think not of it as
a civil war affiliant,

lovingly loosed from the
crusts of earth cradles
washed not in the mamas
blood, by RUF ladles

Oh father they chant
i know you no more
a.k.a now my parent
Foday Sankoh collector death whore

for each of the fingers
that pink stones adorn
think not now my love
of all the limbs shorn

off in regeneration
for that liberated nation
bound to truths dust
in soft deceit powers lust

drum beat breaks still
the earth breaths scent deep
decaying smiles
witness nations weep

sun baked babies
play with cold steel
cool on their thirsty skin
innocent of whats wrong, whats real

chess pawn children
blank in mind but for hate
massaging conflict
blood diamonds seal fates

washing in scarlet
fed on bullet and lie
in the place where life started
now where humanity's departed,

oh my sweetheart
think of fear not
when your mouth feels dry
at how your stone was begot

tiz only a small stone
what can one hurt?
tiz only a small stone
pulled from the dirt.

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O

Orphani

16 years 3 months ago

This is a breath taking work

This is a breath taking work you've conjured up here Vixs. Think about the essence of what you are trying to say and consolidate your poem to that barest expression. Added words just dilute your point. thers a powerful nucleus of a poem with a lot of great lines in this. B
L

Lunegirl

16 years 3 months ago

Thankyou Barry, i am

Thankyou Barry, i am struggling a bit at the moment to edit, i did a write yesterday strait into story post and it didn't work, it was a really good raw write, i was so frustrated at myself for not writing it on paper first1! Oh well im hoping that more comes back to me or inspiration to hone this one ; ) vix
O

Orphani

16 years 3 months ago

Don’t see your struggling

Don't see your struggling in a negative light. It's all learning.You can't force out the changes. Get closer to your subject through study of what it means to you on all levels and freshening up on the dtails of your subject. Put yourself more deeply into it. Take a general look at the piece as an objective observer.You can make small changes.If it dosen't seem right you may have to put it asside. Don't worry the poem will surface in another form, but in a truer expression of you. Always turn in a possitive direction. Make your weak points add to your through disipline and control. I have the same issues as do many poets. You feel your talent rests on one line in one poem that's going to define you forever.Poems are like kids they give you a hard time but in the end their worth it.Except for that ass whipping part. B
Kailashana

Kailashana

16 years 3 months ago

Vixy, the movie was totally

Vixy, the movie was totally relentless... I've ashamed to say I had little clue as to the reality. SO much beauty is garnered from the blood of the innocents for the always-better-off. I'll leave it at that and suggest that you follow Barry's suggestions. Cut into facets, polish and shine this poem. Love, ~A "What we do for ourselves dies with us. What we do for others and the world remains and is immortal." Albert Pine
L

Lunegirl

16 years 3 months ago

oh Anna,I looked up some

oh Anna, I looked up some stuff yesterday for this, i thought today id see about some links for you, you are so good at giving little links in songs, information ect. I found this, it isn't very nice though. wikipedia also has alot of information if you type in RUF africa, 1991-2001 http://video.google.com/videoplay?docid=-4152057515221402986# So so sad!! love vixy xx
B

Bosscombat

16 years 3 months ago

fuckin A

great poem. sorry i cant give you more than a firm "i like it" and 2 thumbs up :) ♣
Seren

Seren

16 years 3 months ago

Vixy !!!!! Blood Diamonds is

Vixy !!!!! Blood Diamonds is one of my favourite movies ... its brilliant and opened the eyes of millions and makes us all look at the gems on our fingers a little differently I have a 100 yr old garnet ... its from overseas somewhere and everytime I look at it now ... I think if they go through that now ... wtf did they go through back then to get it ... I dont wear it much love and hugs Jayne x x x
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Lunegirl

16 years 3 months ago

gems

Its funny how a piece of coloured stone can elicit such feeling, i loved the film to, i really thought id never wear diamonds after that, but of course there are lots of ethical stones around. I love garnets, they are beautiful. This is a rewrite of whose emacipation, i still have alot of work to do on it love vixy xxx
Seren

Seren

16 years 3 months ago

I would suggest Vix …

I would suggest Vix ... tweak not work on this one ... this is a really awesome poem and if i could've I would have given you five for it ... probably one of your best flow wise ... love and hugs Jayne x x x