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A Fragment of Salvation

A Fragment of Salvation



she knows you

feels your best fit
within her palms
and trusts you will caress
her love with the kindest of care

yet

secrets threaten
and yesterday's ashes
smolder

curl liquid smoke twists
to contaminate the purest air

you bend and measure
in the tremble of darkness
and night finds bedlam
within coarse caverns

time ticks

closes in on routine

and pushes urges
to bite freedom

that small fragment of salvation
it needs to control
to humble your heart

so you might submit to love her
as best you can

— Pamela A. Lamppa, Jan 13, 2010

About This Poem

About the Author

Region, Country: New England - USA, USA

Favorite Poets: Robert Frost, Robert Louis Stevenson, William Butler Yeats, John Keats, Pablo Neruda, Algernon Charles Swinburne, T.S. Elliott, and too many more to begin to cover them all.

More from this author

Critiques

Seren

Seren

16 years 4 months ago

Dear Pamela

A fragment ... of a relationship,thats how I read it ... loved the line breaks they gave it strength and your language use was superb ... throughly enjoyed this write ...and the rhythm and pacing were excellent title was apt have to say your ending left me with a sense of settling for less than ... something ... cannot put my finger on it kind regards love Jayne-Chloe
Pamela A. Lamppa

Pamela A. Lamppa

16 years 4 months ago

Thank you Jayne

So pleased for your comment here and for noticing line breaks. I do struggle with them in freeverse so your words mean a great deal. I am pleased also for your comment about the ending. It is meant to be unsettling and questionable. Good good. You are to come out of this piece feeling uneasy, which is only right when viewing a fragment of the whole. Thank you again. ~Pamela
Kailashana

Kailashana

16 years 4 months ago

lol. Jayne, I have a

lol. Jayne, I have a problem with the word submit (or submitting) I wrote a long thing about it on one of my *spiritual* groups. A Lover doesn't submit. S/he surrenders. And that is a world of difference. ~Anna Other than that it is a poem of intrinsic value, Pamela.. I can find no fault.
Pamela A. Lamppa

Pamela A. Lamppa

16 years 4 months ago

Thank you Anna.

submit - is the correct word choice as one is meant to question purpose, one is meant to feel uneasy; one sees only a fragment of the whole in this piece. Written for emotional effect, this poem should offer readers a feeling of being unfulfilled, of struggle, of uneasiness and should have them questioning cause and effect, action and consequence. I am pleased you enjoyed this one. Thank you. ~Pamela
Seren

Seren

16 years 4 months ago

Your right again dear lady

Your right again dear lady ... ever so right .. you have a good day and I shall say goodnight and love to you both Jayne x x x
L

lyz

16 years 4 months ago

Dear Pamela

I enjoyed the read and I also found no fault. I love your words and am looking forward to reading more. Love Lyz. XX
Electric Blue

Electric Blue

16 years 4 months ago

A Fragment of Salvation

Pamela Secrets threaten and yesterday's ashes smoulder So you might submit to her love the best you can These words struck hard in my heart as one waits for the love to be returned Electric Blue
Pamela A. Lamppa

Pamela A. Lamppa

16 years 4 months ago

Thank you

I am pleased for your comment on this piece and am so glad you enjoyed it and could find familiarity within the lines. Your words mean a great deal. Thank you again. ~Pamela