Snarl of the Tongue

Snarl of the Tongue

Written & copywritten by Tink 1/3/09

Jolted and taken back
By the harshness of its tone.
An otherwise sweet tongue's bite
Struck me to my bone.

Viciousness spewed everywhere
So spiteful to love’s refuge.
Momentary lapse of judgment
The detriment was huge.

Peeling through its layers
Easily penetrating flesh
Gnawing to the heart
Leaving it a mess.

Exposing its tenderness
Disregarding damage done.
Looking for an argument
Causing me to run.

Foolishness retreats
He comes to his senses.
His eyes fill with apologies
For all of his offenses.

— Tink, Jan 04, 2010

About This Poem

About the Author

Region, Country: Pennsylvania, USA

Critiques

Ink Dragon

16 years 5 months ago

Tink!

You're back! Unfortunately, no time right now, will read tomorrow. (hugs) Yours, ~Nina

Lunegirl

16 years 5 months ago

Does he stay apologetic??

Does he stay apologetic?? love the language used in the 3rd line first stanza, and also the third stanza. A very good raw and honest poem about cruel love! vicki

Candlewitch

16 years 5 months ago

Hi Tink

Ah cruel love... I've experienced it from both ends. A very good and honest write. You've brought back several memories to me with this write on the harshness of loving. Always, Cat

Tink

16 years 5 months ago

thank you...

Nina! I finally took a break from Blood Lines to peel off a poem! Vicky, my husband had a bad day. usually he is the most wonderful man on the face of the earth, except the other night. He was picking for an arguement and when i wouldn't give him one, he realized how stupid he was being and apologized. all is well in my universe once again. the night of his stupidity birthed this poem. and yes, he remains apologetic! thank you for reading. Cat, thank you for the read. I was very pissed off when i wrote this. had some trouble with it, but its been awhile since i've written a poem. Novel is taking up all my time. Live, Laugh and Love (and don't forget to write) Tink

weirdelf

16 years 5 months ago

Not a letter out of place, tink

I think this novel writing has really honed your skills. The rhyme is so effortless seeming I didn't even notice it first read, and on subsequent reads the whole piece only became stronger. I would certainly hate to be the subject of it, but it still impaled me like a scorpion on a pin, cos I have been that subject. Cheers, Jess, reprehensibly irrepressible

Tink

16 years 5 months ago

aw, now you are just making me blush!

Jess, thank you for that incredible compliment. thank you. Live, Laugh and Love (and don't forget to write) Tink

Seren

16 years 5 months ago

Dear Tink

Jess said it well, I didnt notice it rhymed till after I read it ... always a sign of a smashing wrote Imo Love JC

Race_9togo

16 years 5 months ago

Hiya Tink...

Tink writing prose...THAT explains the absence! Good write, this. Like that sting in the first stanza, it grabs my attention. The need to tear a strip off the writer is palpable, and I really like the way it all just drains out into feeling stupid and contrite at the end. You been talking to my wife, haven't you? Heehee. Good to see you back Tink...take more breaks from the book, 'cuz we miss you and your fine poems. Respectfully Jim "Laws and rules don't kill freedom: narrow-minded intolerance does" : Race

Tink

16 years 5 months ago

Thanks JC and Jim!

jc, thanks so much! hope all is well. jim, lol ! novel is about 5-8 chapters from being completed. thanks for the compliment on the poem. I'll see what I can do about spending more time here. It's good to be missed! Live, Laugh and Love (and don't forget to write) Tink

Ink Dragon

16 years 5 months ago

Ok, here goes,

yup, great poem. My only points of nitpickyness are the periods in the first two stanzas, I think you could lose them after the respective 2nd lines. Was it only hubby who was having a bad day? ;) Yours, ~Nina