Seren

Dec 22, 2009 ⭐ View statistics (Premium feature)

Pooling sighs of logic

tell me your name
let run my fingers
across the contours
of your mouth,
describe the sunset
so that my mind
can envision,
what corneas
cannot

remember for me
as you speak of the now,
what is consumed
by the cacophony of sound,
my only affirmation

within whispers of meaning
this fool travels
shuffling to melodies
in the tap...tap...tap
ever haunted by memories,
having seen a glimpse
of corridors in radiance
between worlds

heat,emotion,touch,sound

all lost in the longing
to walk soundless

nudging past your temples
with my hands
the pool of logic
... purls,
and I see all
with the reach
of a great horned owl

— Seren, Dec 22, 2009

About This Poem

About the Author

Region, Country: Beyond the Black Stump..Australia, AUS

Favorite Poets: Pablo Neruda, P.K.Page, W.H.Auden, to many and various to include them all ...

Critiques

Ink Dragon

16 years 5 months ago

Dear Jayne,

wow, you wrote this only today? My fav stanza was this one: remember for me as you speak of the now, what is consumed by the cacophony of sound, my only affirmation (goosebumps) But I had some trouble with this one: within whispers of meaning this fool travels shuffling to melodies in the tap…tap…tap ever haunted by memories, having seen a glimpse’s in corridors of radiance between worlds I believe it's the line "having seen a glimpse's" that does not sit right with me. Can you fix that? Yours, ~Nina

Seren

16 years 5 months ago

Dear Nina

Thanks so much for having a look at this one ... yeah lol it was started in chat and tonight when it got quiet i looked at it again and it just went somewhere totally different for me ... that line was bothering me as well have done a small patch let me know if its working or not my tired mind has worked on this one for a while lol cant see the forest for the trees lol love and hugs Jayne xoxox

Kailashana

16 years 5 months ago

girl….from beginning to

girl....from beginning to end... a landscape of amazement, I'm asking *who* ARE you? Mum Don’t let your victories go to your head, or your failures go to your heart.

Seren

16 years 5 months ago

Robb just left its 5am I

Robb just left its 5am I just found this ... when I find out you will be the first to notice love you, night or morning or whatever the helll it is lol Jayne x x

Ink Dragon

16 years 5 months ago

Ah, Jayne,

that does work better. I think you have indeed created another one of your masterpieces here. Yours, ~Nina

Seren

16 years 5 months ago

Dear Nina

Thanks for coming back and thanks for the stars ... I appreciate it very much love and hugs Jayne

Worldwide Freeride

16 years 5 months ago

................................................................

.................................................... .................................................... .................................................... Suh-suh-suh-sowwie! It just well took me round about 25 mins to readjust my jaw after it dislatched itself from my skull and hit the floor! This is just A-W-E-Some! I sat here speechless as I read this in sheer amazement of what you have written, sublime detail that etches the visuals into your memory and beating heart that feel the very contours on your soul and there from dreams we are welcomed by the wise perched owl, blinking and beckoning us all. You take your writing to another level and pull the readers into another world, fuelled with passion, gusto and emotion in ever traced outlines but never hueless or bland. Outstanding Jayne! Dale :)

Seren

16 years 5 months ago

Deat Dale

Your comment came at the end of a trying day to say the least ... I appreciate the time you took in coming to read ... brought tears to my eyes to be honest ... you and Nina just made me smile and I cannot thank you enough for that today love and hugs Jayne x x

Damo

16 years 5 months ago

Lush…green… moist

Lush...green... moist foliage... rich... dark... light...

Seren

16 years 5 months ago

LOL you like my avatar? I

LOL you like my avatar? I have white/blonde hair with Heterochromia iridium (two different coloured eyes lol)look nothing like that picture kind regards Jayne :)

Geezer

16 years 5 months ago

I too...

Love the line at the end, with the great horned owl. They are revered by many cultures, in many countries. I love you too. White hair, Heterochromia iridium and all. It is your heart, that I see. All else matters not. And who would I be to talk? After throwing myself at the world for 60 odd years, I am definitly not pretty by any means. Your real pics are a whole lot better looking than you give yourself credit for. So There! Huggles, love and biggles, ~ Gee

Seren

16 years 5 months ago

Oh dear Gee I am far from

Oh dear Gee I am far from pretty at the moment but I thank you regardless :)... your a good friend ... and we all throw ourselves at the world and some of us get a little more battered than others eh ? but they call it character and you have it in spades darlin ... those last lines are my favourites as well :) love and hugs Jayne x x

Fleur MacDonald

16 years 5 months ago

Your logic is

Profound!!! What more can I say!! Very much enjoyed reading this one!! Brilliant!! :)xxxx

Seren

16 years 5 months ago

Dear Fleur !!

Soooo good to see you gorgeous !!!... hope your doing ok and youve been in my thoughts lots lately ... so happy you liked this one big smile (huggles) and mountains of love back atcha Jayne-Chloe x x x x