dreams above and below the Equator

It's three o'clock in the morning and I awaken
with a dream of you. I see you standing underneath
the river birch, winter-bare. It is raining. You seem frightened
and I feel your fear. You hear my voice calling
and you start running. Stop. You are clutching your heart,
and I
think I'm the dreamer in an other nightmare and I can feel
my sorrow.

You seem lost and the rain is soaking you through in your summer shirt. I'm standing
much higher than I remember. We're further apart
then ever before. You, South of the equator, I, North.

— Kailashana, Dec 11, 2009

About This Poem

About the Author

Critiques

Seren

16 years 6 months ago

Dear Mum

Love never does ... even when you think you have... and your blowing my mind lately with your writing its brilliant ... love and hugs Jayne x x

Kailashana

16 years 6 months ago

Ha! Smarty pants, my poetry

Ha! Smarty pants, my poetry has always been brilliant, you just never noticed before! Love, Mum p.s. My signature lines DOES NOT apply to me. ;-) Don’t let your victories go to your head, or your failures go to your heart.

Seren

16 years 6 months ago

PMSL … I know its always

PMSL ... I know its always brilliant ... and your signature line made me start the other night thought it was a P.s to me hahaha then realised it was your sig .... I have always loved your poetry and always noticed just what can you say to perfection and most times I cannot see anything to critique lol and simply your the teacher I am the little serf running round still trying to find the chooks head lol hoping mine isnt far from it lol ... ;) love you (huggles) and thankies for the laugh ... love and hugs Jayne x x

Kailashana

16 years 6 months ago

Btw, As I am indeed very sad

Btw, As I am indeed very sad for your mum's loss, but i ask you, what am i--chopped liver? And please don't stop listening to them little birdies in your head. They are annoying sometimes, but hey, you know what happens when you break open one egg only to find another one? Kiss. Kiss. Mum Don’t let your victories go to your head, or your failures go to your heart.

Seren

16 years 6 months ago

definately not chopper liver

definately not chopper liver ... those little birdies are screeching their asses off after not writing for a few days lol ... and I am obeying the call just sitting here trying to work out my ending for the dollies lol ... love and hugs jayne x x x

pleiades

16 years 6 months ago

you had me from “it’s

you had me from "it's three o'clock..." your last 2 lines say it all really... but how wonderful it was to read those preceding.

pleiades

16 years 6 months ago

dang nabbit…i always

dang nabbit...i always forget the rating thingy. (also, i have title envy...)

Kailashana

16 years 6 months ago

Title envy? In all of

Title envy? In all of Pleiades, who could have known? Is there any more fun than this side of the game? Hugs. Don’t let your victories go to your head, or your failures go to your heart.

Arrow

16 years 6 months ago

Love those line breaks

which serve to emphasize your last point - connections still exist even when things/relationships/people are broken. There are a few punctuation boo-boos. I could've done without the last two lines because I feel like the previous stanza ends in a perfect metaphor. This poem tugs at my heart, esp. having lost a partner. Ghosts are quite the pranksters, aren't they? Mine love hide and seek and springing out from corners unexpectedly.

Kailashana

16 years 6 months ago

Thanks Arrow, I think I

Thanks Arrow, I think I fixed the punctuation. Either my glasses or the screen is dirty. Can't possibly be my misplaced fingers. Glad you like the line breaks. I kinda like them too, esp the longest one. And the last 2 sentences came as an after-thought, thanks for your input. I have removed them and now the poem is right-as-rain. It's not easy to lose or leave partners, be they loved ones or significant combatants. My x is both. ~A Don’t let your victories go to your head, or your failures go to your heart.