welcome to my mind.

           I'm sitting here pondering over beautiful music with phenominal thoughts flowing through my head and coursing through my veins as freely as the blood that keeps me alive. The pen that i write with becomes an extention " NO" a physical attachment to my body. My writings, though sloppy and sometimes incoherent in  their meanings and truths in the end gets it's point across, whether read only once or a million times.

          But...... Why am i writing now and what point or meaning am i working with to make true in so many failing lives and minds, including myself in that meaningful mass of words and an exasperating choice of lifestyle. Lifestyle...... What is that really? Just another set of long useless words to describe, inscribe someone's glamorous, glorious, unforgiving, sometimes relenting and over demanding choices. Just as god modeled ourselves after his self, does that give me the right to call myself a god in someways? That upon my ascension to other planes of reality or life my writings will forever be taken to heart by those that will use it as a guiding light to help carve a path through the theoretical years to come.

A quick pause..... take a deep breath and exhale slowly. time to move on and continue.

         All it takes is a moments pause to bring back the thoughts that flow through every pore and folicle of my body on to paper hoping that it will be the one to change everything, stop time and reverse life to the point when good and bad collide for the first time. That spot in life where sin being new and undiscovered tastes sweet and smells strong of excitement and trust. Almost overwhelming in it's own way. Yes...... That point where your most vulnerable without knowing it, impressionable and innocent to say the very least. 

        Or maybe I dream of too much?

        Knowing full well that even if i or others were capable of doing such acts that we're all delaying or pushing aside for a mere moment , a flash in the jumble of puzzle pieces called life. Sin is eternal, The only thing that really stands the test of time, in pushing it back or aside is like rolling a snowball. eventually becoming so large that it will be overwheling in its own way. So whats the use to think that way? Hope, wish, i guess you could say it's almost fun to toy with it. Messing, pushing, prodding, hoping to discover a weakness or soft spot. Then the real excitement will actually start, saving yourself one step at a time.

       Thats what this is all about. In the end if you can't save yourself then whats the use of saving someone else, if only to prove that tragedy and pain can exist and inflict ten-fold. Once again...... Breathe in and wait for the thoughts to come and posess me like a madman. I will kill the paper with which i write on, butcher and enjoy my latest victim. Treasuring it like a great prize to be coveted for all time.
                                                                                                                                                                        Enjoy fellow reader ,
                                                                                                                                                                                                  Welcome to my mind