ziggy

Nov 10, 2009 ⭐ View statistics (Premium feature)

TRANSMIGRATE

You wafted into my
inner sanctum with
such unfathomable
ease,

I suddenly found
your presence in
the midst of my
bared soul.

while i waited for my
conscious mind to
catch up with this
tremulous reality

Words failed my
tightly coiled tongue
body limp with unspoken
readiness

You sprung from a
trampoline deep into
this relinquished void
for our mutual symbiosis.

— ziggy, Nov 10, 2009

About This Poem

About the Author

Country/Region: IRL

Critiques

seabhac

16 years 7 months ago

I liked this one Ziggy

The title didn't immediatly relate to the poem until I got to the end but it was the first verse that did it for me...just beautiful. I was a little confused with the lines body limp with unspoken readiness a conflict in my head between limp and ready...is it witin a different context and I have just misunderstood it. I really do like this Ziggy and it is the type of relationship I hope for maybe oneday... to be part of someones inner sanctum with such unfathomable ease, Seabhac

ziggy

16 years 7 months ago

hi seabhac

hi there i know the title may only loosly fit but as you may know it means to be reborn again in another body , and the third and forth stanza dealing with the soul of another been born to that body and being limp as if near a sort of death and being ready for this union but it never being spoken about as in the line "body limp with unspoken readiness , i only mean maybe a death of sorts maybe the ending of an old life and being reborn by a soul mate , i might of been better to say nothing at this stage until more read but i hope this helped ,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,zigs

seabhac

16 years 7 months ago

Thanks Ziggy

sometimes it just needs a glimmer of context to set the thought in the right direction. Yes I can see now how that line body limp with unspoken readiness is like a juxtaposition between places or forms, in fact it fits very well in this poem. It has certainly helped me to understand better. I have liked your work of late and I see a stretching of the mind, a beautiful thing to behold indeed. Thanks for taking the time to clarify this for me Seabhac

ziggy

16 years 7 months ago

hi again

hi again thanks for coming back i am so glad it makes sence as i have a habit of posting some of them straight away as i did this time ,cheers again ,,,,,,,,,,,,,,ziggy

Orphani

16 years 7 months ago

Very nicely constructed with

Very nicely constructed with consistantly flowing metaphors. I think the title is very appropriate the basic meaning "to go from one place to another". work on the originality of your metaphors as cleche's tend to detract from a verse by carrying in to much baggage.Originality of metaphor is highly desireable in any serious work.You have a lot going for you in this poem that shows a lot of promise and a developing style.Dig a little deeper I am in the process of learning these very same thing. and look forward to your future evolution as we grow togeather. I like it but don't be overly concerned with what people like. .........o

ziggy

16 years 7 months ago

hi there

i am delighted to get a comment from your self and i will try and follow your advice i welcome any critic any thing folk have to say but i understand what your saying many many thanks the more i think i understand about poetry the more there seems to be to learn i guess its a never ending process which i am enjoying it all here so much chat soon my good man ,,,ziggy

lyz

16 years 7 months ago

Dear Ziggy

Hot to trot tart boy, great pic,lol. Oh I am supposed to comment on your poem,lol. I enjoyed your play on words with this one and I see the romantic side is experimenting in a more sensuous write, well, I enjoyed it and I think you have found your niche. They say bald men have too much testosterone so now I know where your extra is going, into your well written poetry of late, lol. Damn phone, lol. Will check out other poems later, love all. Well done Zig, Love to you and yours. Lyz. XX

ziggy

16 years 7 months ago

lol lol lyz

o my dear lyz your comment does really make me laugh the new pic is me covering up the top of the head ya know the solar panel i mentioned in the pm and yes i am heeding your advice i even like this one lol , that is a great comment cherers lyz wizy seems buzy ,,,,,ziggy.

Seren

16 years 7 months ago

Congratulations on spotlight

Congratulations on spotlight Ziggy and a wonderful poem well done love and hugs Jayne x x

ziggy

16 years 7 months ago

hi jayne

hi cheers for reading this i`m glad it hit the spot ,cheers ziggy

Bonitaj

16 years 7 months ago

Oops! you did it again ZIggy!

Congrats on the spotlight! Liked the sheer intrigue of this one... somehow had me thinking of saying "Of our symbiosis" at the end... just made more sense to me that way! What ya think? Keep up the good work! Bonita j

ziggy

16 years 7 months ago

hi there

opps i did it again, reminds of a pop song lol cheers for the input i can see that line working i`ll give it some thought cheers ,,ziggy

Bonitaj

16 years 7 months ago

sorry Zig!

Meant it in a fun sort of way - i.e. that you managed to get in the Spotlight twice in one week! not bad! not bad at all! Keep 'em coming! Good work! Boni

ziggy

16 years 7 months ago

oops

o yes sorry lol , you got me there i`d love to keep them coming if only i knew where they came from cheers ,,,,,,zigs

Candlewitch

16 years 7 months ago

Dear Ziggy

I see I got here late... that's me, a day late and a dollar short. But better late than never, and I wouldn't have wanted to miss this one, as it is one of your best. I think the title is very smart and I love your language use. The theme is cleverly presented. And I read your poem made spotlight! Well... I am voting to keep it there! This is a magnificent piece and it makes the reader really think about the sentiment behind the words. Always, Cat

ziggy

16 years 7 months ago

hi cat

hi cat , i thought i might of over done it this time as it is easy to ruin a poem with certain words and all but i am delighted all in all i even surprise my self sometimes lol many thanks cat as your comments are always very welcome here cheers ,,,ziggy

Hooded Stranger

16 years 7 months ago

Spotlight hogger

Stop writing such awesome poems, you're stopping me getting even in the top 10 of spotlight! Seriously, this is one your best...not the best!...but a very close second indeed. Stanza of the month award goes to: while i waited for my conscious mind to catch up with this tremulous reality it says it all, such an image. You have sculptured the perfect masterpiece in what is actually only 5 lines of text...now that is impressive. I bow to your mastery my friend. Now bugger off and let me have some of that spotlight! regards, HS ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- "With all that I am and all that I could be, I walk this earth and yet nobody sees me".

ziggy

16 years 7 months ago

LOL

HA you crack me up dan you really do great comment , this came to me quickly when i came across the title word and i said mmmmmmmmmm idea ,,,,,,,cheers i`m buggering of ,,lol ,,,,,ziggy

Kailashana

16 years 6 months ago

Zigs, that would seem to be

Zigs, that would seem to be the ultimate question. Is there life after death, and who transmigrates? The bundle of thoughts, feelings, experiences, that is known as Anna? I think not. Or maybe, who knows? Now being able to bi-locate. To sit there with you reading this email... Now THAT would be interesting. I mean hanging out with anyone we choose to anytime, regardless of time space and distance? Buggered or stoked, keep the inner fires burning, Ziggy. ~A "...when it agrees with reason and it will benefit one and all, then accept it and live by it." ~ Buddha

ziggy

16 years 6 months ago

transmigrate

to be or not to be that this the question ......... o ya bi-locate that would be fun .....mmmmmm lol o ya buggered lol fires are burning but god knows for how long ,,,,,i have another one of sorts i wrote last night ,,,,,,,,,,,,,might leave it till weekend to post thanks for your insightfull comments ,zigs

Cloudthings

16 years 6 months ago

describes so well that incredulous sensation... bravo!

Beautifully done dear Zig... You have written this one so I feel it in the gut, I know this sense of awed confusion at the intensity of another having set up their presence in our sacred spaces of heart & head... really well balanced this one I felt, describes so well that incredulous sensation... bravo! Cheers Anni~ "When we feel love and kindness toward others, it not only makes others feel loved and cared for, but it helps us also to develop inner happiness and peace". H.H. the Dalai Lama

ziggy

16 years 6 months ago

hi`d

hi `d many thanks for the cooments anni glad you got to read it cheers ,,,,zigs ````àm delighted you felt it

Electric Blue

16 years 6 months ago

Transmigrage

Ziggy Great play on words but i could relate to this It is a place I have come to know enjoyed this Blue

ziggy

16 years 6 months ago

transmigrate

well well your reading my poems at a great rate cheers thank you , i spent alot of thought with this one many thanks zigs